I actually liked this movie. It won’t win awards, and I will not spend any money on it, but for a good time I suggest you check this out. If you’re a guy. Usually the casting of a hot girl to distract me never works, but here, looking at Elisha Cuthbert, I just couldn’t help but dismiss the flaws. And there were plenty of flaws. Elisha Cuthbert is really hot. She has this amazing face and unbelievable body, she’s just not human, and that was the saving grace for me with this movie. Watching her parade herself back and forth was amazing and she won me over completely. And then there’s Timothy Olyphant who plays sleazy porno director Kelly, who proves to be quite an obstacle and nemesis for Hirsch’s character. Olyphant is entertainingly over the top in this film, with all the usual clichés with spiky hair, a menacing grim, and sleaze galore.
Tag Archives: Comedy
Home on the Range (2004)
“Home on the Range” is a sign post, it’s a sign post up ahead the reads the basic end of Disney. What once was a company that gave us “The Lion King” and “Bambi” now gives us crap like “Lilo and Stitch”, their direct to video sequels of their classic films, and–this. I wanted to like “Home on the Range”, I really did, I was expecting at best an entertaining animated film that was a guilty pleasure, and even that doesn’t pull off my expectations at all. I was so disappointed after liking the pictures of the animated characters that I saw, but, man, this is a lame movie. The animation is very reminiscent of masters such as Tex Avery, Chuck Jones, and Bob McKimson, the era where cartoons were actually good and funny, does anyone remember that?
Envy (2004)
Here’s my pitch for a product: A spray that causes really bad movies to vaporize into air. The first victim I’d choose for the spray would be “Envy”. This is a heaping helping pile of excrement. “Envy” is purely and utterly awful and I just don’t know where a plot with such potential, and a cast of great actors could have possibly taken a turn for the worst. Now, if I’m not mistaken, this is a comedy… isn’t it? Or at least it was supposed to be. Well there were Jack Black, Ben Stiller, and Amy Poehler, and yet I didn’t laugh once.
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004)
If you could wipe a tragic event from your life completely from your memory, would you? If you could wipe clean a tragic, abusive, or damaging relationship with someone clean from your mind, would you? If you, I, anyone had the chance, would we? I know I would, but the tragic picture painted here by the talented Michel Gondry and Charlie Kaufman. While I just did not like the duo’s previous outing and my first introduction in to their abilities “Human Nature”, I did manage to find a lot to like in films like “Adaptation.,” and “Being John Malkovich.” Regardless, “Eternal Sunshine” might seem like a high concept confusing movie for the casual movie-goer who doesn’t want to think, but open your mind and watch this heartbreaking, often sad, and very surreal love story that will surely manage to play on many viewer’s vulnerabilities.
Pieces of April (2003)
This is not your conventional holiday film. It doesn’t exploit emotions for the sake of drawing tears from the audience, nor does it shove the whole holiday theme down our throats, this is an independent film with a holiday theme that tends to focus more on the actual character within the general theme of the holidays. What’s shown is an array of colorful and somewhat eccentric character dealt into an engrossing story of family and values. If you’re sick and tired of the usual holiday fare, check this out. It’s a great story about family and holidays. “Pieces of April” we learn is symbolic of the main character April’s attempts at making amends with her family. It’s alluded that she was a troubled girl so, not only does the story become a quest for April to finish her meal, but it becomes a quest to prove to her family that she’s reformed.
Blade: Trinity (2004)
This review is being written at a good time for me, not only because I dug the last two Blade films, but because of the lawsuit Wesley Snipes has just waged on the studios about this movie. Snipes is a known diva, if you’ve read the past issues of “Fangoria” and “Starlog”, though his co-stars and director Goyer don’t openly admit it, Snipes is known for being a diva, and now he seeks retribution for a movie he claims he didn’t want to make, for starring along side people he didn’t want to star with being directed by a director who he says was forced on him. Regardless, I didn’t think “Blade 3” would live up to the first two. People often say there’s hardly any sequels that are as good as the first film, but I have something better for you. How many second sequels are better than the first film?
New York Minute (2004)
Why anyone would still find the Olsen Twins even remotely appealing is still beyond me, unless you find spoiled, rotten, rich girls appealing, then perhaps they’re for you. Luckily, “New York Minute” was a flop and I had a good laugh, but let’s face it, they laughed all the way to the bank. It’s clear judging by the movie that the Olsen’s have zero talent, and they prove just because you can buy yourself into a movie doesn’t mean you should be in one. Nonetheless, this is not a movie to be taken seriously even by someone as uptight about movies as me, but as harmless as this tries to be, you can’t also escape the fact this is a basic rip-off of “Ferris Bueller”, a much much better movie with an actual believable premise, where as this is basically driven on the vanity of the Olsen twins.