Director Michael Davis’ “Beanstalk” has a lot of balls in the air. It wants to squeeze in so many ideas and sub-plots and can never find a proper way to bring them all in to one coherent kids film. There’s a boy named Jack who lives with his mother and discovers large beans that form a humongous beanstalk. Meanwhile, Jack’s mom is going to lose her house, prompting Jack and his mom to go homeless. Meanwhile, there’s a nutty doctor (Margot Kidder is barely recognizable) who believes the mother goose tales to be real, and is preparing to climb the beanstalk, while an evil land developer is planning to knock down the beanstalk, steal Jack’s house, and develop land over the his neighborhood. That’s a lot story, for a movie barely eighty minutes in length!
Tag Archives: Kids
Magic Island (1995)
1995’s “Magic Island” from Moonbeam Entertainment is one of the few Charles Band backed kids films I’ve never actually seen. Which is odd, considering I loved Full Moon as a kid, and Zachary Ty Bryan was on one of my favorite TV show of the nineties “Home Improvement.” Like many of the Moonbeam films, “Magic Island” is not a perfect film by any stretch, but you have to appreciate its ambition, flaws and all. A good mixture of “The Neverending Story” and “The Princess Bride,” Sam Irvin’s adventure film is a goofy kids film with enough innocence to warrant good B grade family fare.
Scooby-Doo: Wrestlemania Mystery (2014) [DVD/Blu-ray/Digital]
The Scooby gang have come across almost every popular star since they were introduced on television. From the Harlem Globetrotters to Batman and Robin, no one was off limits to them. Surely enough with WWE ruling the sports world currently, their crossover with the Scooby gang was not only inevitable but it makes perfect sense, when you consider it. They met The Harlem Globetrotters. Mike Piazza. KISS. This was a long time coming.
JLA Adventures: Trapped in Time (2014)
Because superheroes fighting crime isn’t enough, DC has to water it down even further for some reason. “Trapped in Time” is only a slightly edgier version of “Superfriends” placing the greater emphases on younger Leaguers and superheroes rather than focusing on the actual Justice Leaguers. That Superman, Batman and Wonder Woman are so square, man. They don’t know today’s youth. Now, whiny impulsive Robin? He knows what the youth is about. Running at under an hour in length, and with a pacing that’s breakneck, “Trapped in Time” is kind of a Justice League movie. But then it really isn’t.
Kindergarten Cop (1990)
Back in the eighties and nineties, Arnold Schwarzenegger was larger than life. With his large build and thick Austrian accent, his rough exterior was contradicted by his sweet personality. This carries over more than successfully in Ivan Reitman’s “Kindergarten Cop,” one of his many efforts to connect with younger audiences. His transformation in to kids film star is nearly seamless, as he’s able to connect with his primarily younger cast surprisingly well, and garners a strong chemistry with just about everyone in the film.
Camp Nowhere (1994)
The kids romp “Camp Nowhere” is yet another of the many “Home Alone” clones of the nineties that provides us with kids smarter than actual working adults that happen in to a situation both extraordinary and fantastic. What kid wouldn’t want to make their own summer camp and do what they want rather than stick to schedules, structure and physical activities? “Camp Nowhere” works mainly as a film you have to suspend disbelief for, if only because it’s hard to believe any of these adults could be fooled by children. But then in the nineties every kid was at least ten times smarter than any adult, and they knew their way around the world.
Blank Check (1994)
The early to mid-nineties were filled with movies that really wanted some of that sweet “Home Alone” cash, thus many movie studios pumped out their own versions. You could almost call these rip offs but they were given enough of a twist to where they felt original. “Blank Check” only had about a movie’s worth of story to it, but it tried very hard for the “Home Alone” audience, and really was just a mediocre to abysmal kids film that barely made a ripple upon its release. It’s yet another film about a child that drops in to an extraordinary situation and runs afoul hard nosed criminals that eventually confront him and are put through punishment through his own series of gags, quick thinking, and devices.





