La Belle et La Bête (2014)

Posted on November 12, 2015 by Emilie Black

In this telling of the tale as old as time, Belle lives with her salesman father, three troublemaker brothers, and two greedy sisters. Belle prefers to lead a calmer, simpler life than her siblings. As her father’s business goes badly and her brother loses a lot of money gambling, the father becomes indebted to the Beast and so in a trade, Belle agrees to live with the Beast. Once at the castle, she is cared for by a group of tadums, fairy tale animals who look a bit like dogs. She is given all that she could need and more, she however, has to have dinner with the Beast every single night, which does not go well at first. With time and patience, Belle and the Beast become closer and closer.

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Lost After Dark (2014)

Posted on October 12, 2015 by Felix Vasquez

I appreciate the need for filmmakers to evoke the eighties building slasher movies within the confines of the decade, but often time movies can get so lost in paying homage to the culture, it doesn’t focus enough on entertaining. “Lost After Dark” falls victim to this gimmick where we have a movie set in the eighties and based around the eighties aesthetic, and yet fails to re-invent the wheel as a slasher film. While we’re at it, the whole grindhouse flourishes feel woefully superfluous to the film, and never adds anything. That said, “Lost After Dark” isn’t a bad movie, it just never manages to be anything but mediocre.

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Berry Gordy’s The Last Dragon (1985)

Posted on August 6, 2015 by Felix Vasquez

It’s hard to express why I love Berry Gordy’s “The Last Dragon” so much. I have loved it for years ever since I was a small child and used to watch it religiously on network television every time it came on. Perhaps it’s the minority hero, perhaps it’s the Bruce Lee idolatry, who the hell knows? With “The Last Dragon” I stopped asking why I loved it a long time ago and just embraced it as one of my all time favorite action films. Yes, I said it’s one of my all time favorite action films. It’s not just a film but it’s an experience to boot. Taimak’s performance as Bruce Leroy is just so genuine and fun it’s hard to really rag on his presence here.

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Lake Placid vs. Anaconda (2015) (DVD)

Posted on August 5, 2015 by Felix Vasquez

If you wanted Lake Placid vs. Anaconda, damn it all it’s what you get with this new crossover. Like most films of this ilk, you’re mainly tuning in to watch a lot of really obnoxious characters die brutal deaths, it’s just a shame a lot of it is off screen. Perhaps that’s because this is primarily a TV movie, but I was disappointed to see a lot of the deaths were cut aways and mostly kept sanitary; when you have a giant crocodile and giant snake chomping down on gorgeous sorority girls, that’s just downright criminal. With a movie like this you can’t expect a masterpiece, and oddly enough I went in to it with rock bottom expectations. Did that mean it pleased me proficiently? Not really.

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The Lost Boys (1987)

Posted on October 29, 2014 by Felix Vasquez

It’s pretty rare for a horror comedy to be so very funny while also serving up a genuine sense of terror with every laugh. Though the comedy does intend to spark raucous chuckles, most of it is based around the uneasiness of the situations present. The final showdown in the finale is hilarious, but only because our characters are in such severe danger and are at risk of being torn apart if they don’t step lively. “The Lost Boys” is a flawless vampire film that is so steeped in the eighties, and still manages to retain the timelessness just the same. It’s about two brothers being pulled in opposite sides of the war against good and evil, and their accidental introduction to a city that’s the stomping ground for a clan of century old vampires.

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Leprechaun 2 (1994)

Posted on October 15, 2014 by Felix Vasquez

So apparently, not only does the leprechaun value his gold beyond all else, but he also requires a bride, too. His convoluted rules are that if the bride sneezes three times and no one but the leprechaun blesses her, he can marry her and she’s eternally bound to the knee high monster. The sequel to “Leprechaun” opens in ancient Ireland, where the leprechaun agrees to free his man servant, once he chooses his bride. Unaware the bride is the servant’s gorgeous daughter the servant outwits the leprechaun, causing him to look elsewhere for his bride. Which takes a thousand years on St. Patrick’s Day, for some reason.

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Leprechaun (1993)

Posted on October 15, 2014 by Felix Vasquez

I remember the first time my brother and I asked my parents if we could rent “Leprechaun” from the video store. My dad responded with “No way! You guys won’t be able to look at a box of Lucky Charms for a month!” Suffice it to say he did rent it after we begged, and not only did the movie not scare us, but it bored us to tears. You can just sense that writers behind the concept were running low on mythical monsters to turn in to horror villains. Trolls were taken, as were elves, so the leprechaun seems like a logical but failed next step.

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