The very fact that the producers and creators behind “Metal Man” made this film boggles my mind and leaves me stumped. Why they didn’t seek out the folks behind this “Iron Man” rip off is a missed opportunity to inform these companies to vie for original productions and not knock offs. I will give this to them, the people behind “Metal Man” are not the Asylum film studios. This messy amateur production relies on a metal suited hero named Metal Man whose color scheme is a red and yellowed armor that enables super abilities whenever he’s fighting crime.
Category Archives: Movie Reviews
Dragonball: Evolution (2009)
Well, here’s the odd news. Director James Wong and Twentieth Century Fox seem to rely heavily on mimicking the “Spider-Man” movies by turning our hero Goku in to a new age Peter Parker who has immense power and responsibility with every reason not to use them on his foes; pair that with a Luke Skywalker death scene and you have a mélange of influences with no bond that keeps the film from falling apart from the seams. That is until the day comes when a force of evil conveniently gives his training a purpose. Had “Dragon Ball” been adorned with a different name and a completely different set of characters, it wouldn’t actually be so bad, but when you make the inevitable comparison to the anime, the flaws are quite obvious and ridiculous.
Punisher: Warzone (2008) (DVD)
What Lexi Alexander and Lions Gates attempts to accomplish with this new title in the Marvel movie lexicon is a complete restart of the Punisher franchise and they do this by completely forgetting any and all of the events from the Thomas Jane version and in some respects it’s nice to have a movie that pays due attention to the original origin of madman Frank Castle. Hell, I loved the John Travolta vehicle and still do in spite of fans belly aching, but god help me, “Warzone” is a better film. Why? Frankly because there are very few liberties taken with the mythos and we get down to the nitty gritty.
Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun-Li (2009)
Hi Hollywood, what’s new Capcom? I thought I should start this review here with a bit of Tony Robbins tough love and ask why you still feel the need to option movies whose origins live in the video game world. When will you ever learn that there’s no such thing as a good video game movie and there never will be? Hollywood, you’ve put us through misery for years trying to take plotless video games and turn it on its ear, and have also managed to simultaneously take games with narrative and structure and destroy it without fail. What’s the deal? Don’t the video game movie flops ever help you to realize that there’s just no point in adapting even the most popular games? I’ve lived through Doom, Tomb Raider and Resident Evil and we’ve yet to see something good derived from either of them.
Wonder Woman (2009)
Even as a man who hasn’t held much empathy for the character, “Wonder Woman” has been in the top ten movies I’ve been looking forward for a good year now. Though she was never my biggest influence in regards to comic books, DC and Warner have had a great turn out of Straight to DVD movies and this one is no exception. With excellent voice work and top notch production quality, “Wonder Woman” is a movie that will definitely sell itself to people still adamant in their belief that Diana is more a character for little girls to worship. “Wonder Woman” aims for appeal to everyone from the discerning fan boy, the hardcore general comic book population, and of course young girls who want a break from the boys club for a while. Though I wouldn’t suggest this to girls too young; you can thank the sexual overtones for that (Steve: Your daughter has a nice rack), consumers.
Friday the 13th (2009)
I think the only people who hold grudges more than Jason are the religious and it’s a known fact that Jason is one angry bitter man whose mom is taken down at the first five minutes of the 2009 reboot called simply: “Friday the 13th.” A combination of the first, second and third films in the series, “Friday the 13th” seek to completely redo Jason and start over with a clean slate. This is a great idea especially after desperation from studios forced the masked killer in to deep space and the future of mankind. This is a stripped down reboot that director Marcus Nispel handles with care, because it’s a task liable to be screwed up once he and the writers decide on fitting an origin, a motivation, and the discovery of the hockey mask in only ninety minutes. But he rises to the occasion and actively keeps the story moving with a body count of almost ten people and an admittedly uneven pace. Despite the caveat and probably because of it, Nispel’s treatment of Voorhes makes for the first enjoyable experience at the movies in a long while.
Taken (2008)
Whoa, who knew Liam Neeson was such a hard ass, but then his parental tendency to kick ass and take names when his daughter is kidnapped is never an element that distracts viewers with the believability, mainly because it’s Liam Neeson, a man in his fifties who struts around the film as the hero who is a change of pace from young male models and wrestlers who normally dominating the big screen. Neeson is an antidote to all the barely past puberty action pukes and convinces us that he’ll kill anyone and everyone if you take from him. It’s a true testament that Neeson simply knocks this role out of the park.