To pretend “The Curse of the Black Pearl” possessed an elaborate, epic story rich in characterization and subtle dialogue, would be to set up all sorts of pretensions. “Dead Man’s Chest” is in the same vein as the former, only slightly more intent on showing its blatant grab for big bucks. Disney ran out of ideas, turned to make their rides into movies and got lucky. Big whoop. “Dead Man’s Chest” is fun, though, and I can’t sweat them for that. Verbinski’s direction is on par as usual, and “Dead Man’s Chest” is a gorgeous epic, with some of the better action scenes that trump the original’s.
Category Archives: Movie Reviews
Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning (2006)
Liebesman’s direction is very tight, with much more suspense and atmosphere this time around. When we set down on the four teens being ravaged by the psychotic family, we can instantly gain a sense of futility and sheer dread that otherwise was lacking from the remake. And that helps because “The Beginning” is a much more entertaining entry than the remake was. The acting is better from Ermy this time around, and the basic characters fleshed out slightly more to where they’re less walking victims, and more human drawing slightly more sympathy. And it’s also a plus to watch Jordrana Brewster and Diora Baird run around screaming and giving their surefire scream queen routines. Brewster is a much more sympathetic heroine, and Baird’s “busty babe victim” role is pulled off with as much gusto it requires.
This Film is Not Yet Rated: Unrated (2006)
Pussy, prick, cock, threesome, orgasm, cumming, doggy style, sixty-nine, orgy, jerk off, gang bang, cunt, cunnilingus, glory hole. If any of these words made you cringe, you’ve proven the basic point of “This Film is Not Yet Rated.” Why is America so afraid of sex? Why does sex frighten us? Why does liking certain sexual acts make us flee in terror? What about sex makes us afraid that it will shake our foundation? America is one of the few countries in the world so adamant about concealing sexual acts, and sexual themes are what sink films into NC-17 ratings. And most of these films with the NC-17’s are masterpieces; masterpieces that many people haven’t seen, like “The Dreamers” and “The Cooler.” And, that’s a damn shame.
3-Iron
A lot can be said for facial expression. Mannerisms, expressions, gestures, and actions can often say more than words can. Sitting down at a table with a couple you can instantly notice if they’re either happy and comfortable with one another, or completely out of love and hateful toward one another. What is it about silence and expression that’s so fascinating yet so under-appreciated? To prove the sad fact that this observation has gone utterly unnoticed, most acting is done through the eyes and the face. It’s why silent movies were huge, its why make up artists accentuated the eyes of actors during that era, and it’s why we’re so disconnected in this world. We follow one another by words, and never by mannerisms and expression.
Children of Men (2006)
Forget cannibalistic freaks on a hill, forget a stranger calling, forget a torture house in Eastern Europe, forget a chainsaw bearing monster, two of the scariest movies of 2006 were, without a doubt “When the Levees Broke,” and “Children of Men.” Why? Because both films present the utterly realistic and utterly possible events that will occur, should a natural catastrophe ever shake up the world. What makes “Children of Men” both a masterpiece and probably one of the most horrifying movies of the year is the fact that mass infertility, with the change of climates, evolution, and rising population, is possible, and likely to happen.
Jackass: Number Two (2006)
Bam: I’d rather rip my dick off and throw it in the river, than do that again.
It’s no big new flash, and not a shock that “Jackass” and everything about it, has never been a favorite of mine. I despised the show, despise the talentless asses involved in it, and I loathed the first film. Say whatever you want about me, but I just don’t get what the appeal is about this series. I’m curious when stupid chic became so popular, and why “Jackass” is consistently popular. I just don’t get it, I admit that. But then again, “Jackass: Number Two” had me near tears the entire time. Shocked? You know you are. Close your mouth and keep reading.
Howl's Moving Castle (Hauru no ugoku shiro) (2004)
“Howl’s Moving Castle” is probably one of the weaker entries from Miyazaki. Miyazaki’s films have one thing for them that you can not deny. Originality. “Howl’s Moving Castle” is original, and it’s brutally entertaining, and that’s why I enjoyed this very much. Sure, I was watching the American dubbing (accidental, give me a break), but “Howl’s Moving Castle” possesses more unique fantasy elements and plot progression that really kept me in awe constantly. A scarecrow that follows our heroine like a lovesick dog? An old dog that weighs a ton? A little boy who masquerades as an old man? And a heroine who turns into an elderly woman sporadically? You take a look at Miyazaki’s universe and you’re nothing short of breath taken the entire time.