One thing is certain after watching “Curse of Chucky.” While it is a lower budget reboot of the series that also works as a sequel, director Don Mancini loves the character. There are call backs to the previous movies, and director Mancini keeps the series focused on Chucky and Chucky alone, without the intervention of side characters. Brad Dourif returns to voice the character of Chucky, and has a good time reprising the monstrous killer doll that returns to wreak havoc on a dysfunctional wealthy family with many skeletons in their closet.
Gorezone #28 [Magazine]
I never actually read “Gorezone” when I was a kid. Heck, I never read “Fangoria” until I was a teenager. But after apparent demand by fans for many years, “Gorezone” was brought back after being cancelled after twenty seven issues. “Gorezone” is a less mainstream and more blood soaked sub-magazine for Fangoria that takes more risks, even if it’s definitely slimmer on the read. Right now the editor’s letter admits the newly revived magazine is in its testing stages and may continue adding sections, or stripping them from every issue. Right now, it’s a fun and unique magazine with interesting features.
The Ten Best “Supernatural” Episodes
What with eight seasons behind it, and a questionable season nine coming up, fans of “Supernatural” are still in heavy contention if the CW genre series is perhaps one of the greatest horror shows of all time. Maybe it’s one of the greatest of the network. You can debate on the merits of the argument and the series itself, and surely season six is the worst yet, but it’s managed to churn out some of the most memorable and terrifying moments in genre television. And what with the end of the Winchester clan potentially coming up to its ninth season, here are ten of the best “Supernatural” episodes of all time.
Top Ten Horror Characters We Hate
We all have those movie characters we hate. Horror movie fans especially know the feeling of watching a horror movie and having to endure those obnoxious useless characters that we’re desperate to see perish. If we’re unfortunate enough it’s three or more people we want to die, and if we’re spared, it’s only one. Sometimes they’re whiny, or loud, or useless. Sometimes they’re unfunny, or shrill.
Sometimes they contribute nothing to the survival effort, sometimes they bug the other characters, or do nothing but moan about their own problems. Or sometimes they’re just there to pander to audiences. Every horror movie has that character you wish would just disappear or die a horrible death, and as such we’ve compiled a list of our top ten horror characters we hated. And these are characters we still hate, no matter how much we may enjoy the movies.
10. Teddy – Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter
Is it any wonder everyone in the movie gets to sleep around except this character? Even Crispin Glover gets to sleep with one of the girls in the group, and yet the character who spends most of his time judging people on their relationships ends his sub-plot watching silent porn, and being stabbed to death by Jason.
9. Titus Telesco – I Still Know What You Did…
I like Jack Black like I like apple pie. I’m not crazy about it, but I enjoy it whenever it’s around. But Black as the dreadlock donning rastafarian is one of the worst elements in an already stupid horror movie, and his death is a wonderful release that ensures the writers were intent on murdering everyone who made us roll our eyes. Somehow Brandy was spared.
I can understand anyone being freaked out in this situation. You beat Death, and now Death is coming for you in as twisted a way as possible, but Carter really does nothing but make things difficult for literally everyone and gets Sean William Scott decapitated. Okay, maybe he’s not all that bad. In either case, he shockingly survives until the end. Thank goodness he never appeared in the sequels.
Hell, the writers couldn’t decide on giving Chucky a son or a daughter, so why not give him a transgender sexually confused puppet for a child? That’s funny. I assume. “Seed of Chucky” is a miserable enough movie, but Glen as a whole is a poorly conceived running joke that was so stupid he didn’t even take over the series for Chucky and Tiffany like the producers obviously planned. The studios were smart enough to hit the reboot button before Chucky ended up in space.
Randy was only in “Scream” to explain the references to audiences unfamiliar with horror movies. He serves literally no function other than to stand around explaining every single plot twist and connecting it to a horror movie. Why is he friends with this group? If that isn’t enough, he ends up in college with Sidney Prescott, and once again, he does nothing to help the cause but try to find the killer, and is dumb enough to be murdered in the middle of a crowded college campus. But at least he had the foresight to film a tape of his last words… to explain the story for the audience yet again.
How this fool made it all the way to the end of “Scream 4” is beyond me. In the first film he was a lucky survivor, in part two he was a tragic survivor, and by part three it was clear that writer Kevin Williamson just didn’t have the balls to kill him off. Even in “Scream 4” he evades the new killers at every turn and manages to survive to see the closing credits. Yes, it’s so meta to have the least competent character survive and become the hero, but it’s boring when you know by the third film that nothing bad is going to happen to them.
4. Lindsay and Jenny – Human Centipede
Never drink anything you didn’t mix yourself. And most importantly, don’t trust the man living way out in the middle of nowhere. No matter how nice he seems, he is German, after all. The pair of girls in Tom Six’s ode to stupidity really do nothing but make some of the stupidest moves imaginable, even when it becomes clear to about anyone with common sense that the doctor they’ve happened upon while being stranded is in fact mad and psychotic. And rather than simply run away and come back for her friend, one of the girls goes back to free her friend ultimately sealing her fate as the middle of the centipede. Getting crap forced in to your mouth just about sums up Tom Six’s movie.
3. Kia Waterson – Freddy vs. Jason
Kelly Rowlands can’t act, thus she adds almost nothing to a movie that really needed all of the energy and charisma it could get. The movie was fun, but a risky experiment, and it paid off. No thanks to Rowlands who plays one of the most insignificant best friends in horror history, doing nothing but complaining, and only has a small moment with Krueger who almost tears her nose off in a dream. In an effort to piss off Freddy, possibly the stupidest moment of the movie, Jason thankfully puts the audience out of our misery and smashes her in to a tree.
The only reason Tina is such a large part of the movie is that she was canoodling with the director off screen. There’s no reason why this moronic shrill irritating self centered human manifestation of nails on a chalkboard should have survived until the very end. With Ellie Cornell asking to be let off of the series, the final films basically cut off one of the more likable characters, and replaced her with Tina, her best friend. It’s odd she never appears in “Halloween 4,” or is ever mentioned, but suddenly she’s Jamie’s best friend and big sister? I don’t get it. Not to mention she must have been aware of the fact she and her big sister had a run in with a masked psychopath, and yet does everything to avoid listening to common sense. Even when she’s being sweet, you just hope Michael comes and skewers her with a pitch fork.
1. Everyone from Dawn of the Dead 2004
For survivors, it’s a wonder how any of these morons ever survived a single day in this zombie infested world. These zombies run at full speed and chomp on you, and yet they can barely catch this group of idiots that can’t even get together and devise a solid plan of escape from this mall. They spend the whole movie trying to get to Andy in the gun shop, but don’t figure in the fucking sewer that leads to his shop, until air head Nicole goes to save her mongrel dog Chips. She even drives over there on the truck smashing through zombies and makes it inside Andy’s shop. Hello?! Why didn’t anyone try that?! And they don’t have hobby shops in the mall? How about a high powered toy helicopter to carry a stupid sandwich to his roof top?
Or a race car with a meat loaf strapped to the top to get to Andy? Hell, feed him the dog. And Andy never had a CB radio to contact the group? What, you can build a tank like MacGuyver, but you can’t figure out how to get food to a guy across the parking lot? Ana is probably the shittiest nurse in history, who doesn’t even check up on character Andre’s wife once, considering she’s about to have a child in a world without medicine, doctors, or life support. Genius Michael builds a tank that has the survivors holding active chainsaws in a moving truck. Lo and behold two of the characters are offed during the final chase because their inability to hold a damn chainsaw still. Right, give the chainsaws to the thin woman and feeble elderly man. That’s brilliant. No one ever commandeers the underground parking lot until the lights go out, perhaps to check for gasoline or a working car to escape with. It just goes on and on. Worst remake ever.
The Five Worst “Supernatural” Episodes
5. Party On, Garth
Season Seven
For season six and seven, the writers seemed to be given a task of filling the season with padding episodes. Thus it seems like they scrambled to find episodes that could stall the resolution of the arc and introduce monsters. But after Satan, and death, what else is there? Here, we meet the goofy Garth, introduced by name in “Weekend at Bobby’s.” DJ Qualls is a very underrated character actor who appears in huge shows like “Big Bang Theory,” and “Breaking Bad,” so he’s a guy who can play almost anyone.
Scarecrow (2013)
You assume a movie about a killer scarecrow would be loads of fun, but “Scarecrow” starring Robin Dunne from the slightly entertaining Syfy series “Sanctuary” is only a passable bit of horror fare. It places little emphasis on the scarecrow, and more time on the characters. The scarecrow is a very stock horror character with no personality or real memorable moments. It takes a great talent to sap the frights from a scarecrow, and Sheldon Wilson’s film accomplishes just that.
Beneath (2013)
While normally I enjoy Larry Fessenden’s indie horror films, “Beneath” really is probably the worst he’s ever offered his fan base. Mean spirited, badly acted, and incredibly heavy handed, “Beneath” is never sure of its intention. The only thing it knows is that it keeps looking to the audience asking “Who is the real monster in this movie?” Again and again, every time these despicable and horrible characters make a decision that just inspires you to wish bloody death on them, Fessenden holds the mirror up asking “Who is the real monster in this movie?” After about an hour, I thought “Okay, we get it! Stop forcing it down our throat, already!” Yes, the giant man eating fish is bad, but these people are cold hearted, vicious bastards. Sing another tune, please!











