Movie 43 (2013)

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Maybe they were right after all. Maybe in order to be successful in Hollywood you have to sell your soul. Maybe the entire cast of “Movie 43” made a deal with Lucifer trading success for their souls. And then one day Lucifer had a great idea for a comedy movie. And then rather than doom every one of these stars to eternal damnation being raped and tortured by demons for all of time, he collected on their souls by making them star in his idea for his comedy movie entitled “Movie 43.” He sent them his script idea and they could really do nothing but agree to star in this movie collectively, rather than rebel against their dark lord and master that granted them the price of being household names. That has to be the explanation for “Movie 43.” Damn, that just has to be. The notion that the stars of “Movie 43” thought this could have been a good comedy at all is unfathomable and incredibly mind-blowing.

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The Aggression Scale (2012)

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Director Steven C. Miller is quickly becoming one of my favorite genre directors of late. Premiering with the solid zombie film “Automaton Transfusion,” his films seem to have a grit and guerilla style that often add a sense of urgency. His treatment of “Silent Night” skirted the edges of camp and slasher, while his latest “The Aggression Scale” is a definite step up. Though the film can sometimes show its low budget, director Miller makes great use of marvelous editing along with limited scenery to create an intense and absolutely excellent home invasion thriller.

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Adam and Dog (2011)

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Writer and director Minkyu Lee presents a hypothetical and bittersweet animated short about the first dog ever created. Somewhere along the line after the creation of man and woman, God figured he’d create a dog. The dog however had to find its purpose in nature, and “Adam and Dog” garners an interesting story about man and dog eventually became best friends in nature. Upon the creation of man, the dog found his way around the startling and often frightening landscapes of the world, and Lee presents us with vast and fantastic terrain in which the dog travails.

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Spellcaster (1988)

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Director Rafal Zielinski’s “Spellcaster” is so damn good, I want to hug it, and love it, and cuddle it to pieces. An unabashed childhood favorite, “Spellcaster” originally began life in my household as a VHS purchase from a closing video store in our neighborhood. Soon enough my brother and I enjoyed it so much it became a favorite on VHS, on constant rotation whenever we wanted to have a blast with a goofy eighties horror film. And rest assured, “Spellcaster” is about as goofy an eighties horror film as it gets.

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Hold Your Breath (2012)

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hybJust think: Someone at the Asylum offices dug through their piles of Chinese food menus and eventually found the script for “Hold Your Breath” (I’m not including the superfluous hashtag) tucked away. And someone read it thinking this would be the perfect theatrical debut for an Asylum movie. In reality, “Hold Your Breath” should just be another Asylum clunker on DVD, but it warrants a theatrical debut by virtue of the fact that it has minor horror starlet Katrina Bowden attached.

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Life of Pi (2012)

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6vFCjCdBasically, Ang Lee’s “Life of Pi” is a brilliantly directed and incredibly beautiful film, with amazing special effects and just breathtaking visuals. It is also a tedious sermon wrapped up in an agnostic package that will leave viewers clinging to whatever they want to believe. When it comes to confronting the themes of faith and religion, “Life of Pi” seems bold in explaining that they’re all just basically good for the soul and rejuvenating, but in the end the film seems to stick to the notion that there is only one real God and that’s the Catholic/Christian one.

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The Longest Daycare (2012)

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The-Simpsons-Longest-DaycarBasically, “The Longest Daycare” is a much more advanced and intricate sequel to Maggie Simpson’s adventures in daycare that pays homage to Looney Tunes while also giving the character Maggie some depth. We only saw a portion of it in the episode “A Streetcar Named Marge,” where Maggie united her fellow babies to reclaim her pacifier in the spirit of “The Great Escape.”

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