So, here I sat on the wobbly edge, wondering if I should even read “Wanted.” I mean no one cared about the comic, they loved the movie before it even arrived in theaters, and the stupid comic was short lived, but then I saw that final scene where our main character is screaming in to the page with the bubble reading “This is my Face While I’m fucking you in the ass,” and I chuckled so hard, I had to at least give it a chance. Lasting only six issues, and then being made in to a movie that’s kind of faithful to the comic. Wesley Gibson is an average man who… you’ve seen the trailers for the movie, I assume. Anyway, Wesley Gibson is your average schmuck who could have been played by someone a little more reliable than James Mcavoy. The guy’s a good actor, but not who I envisioned.
The Abductors (1972)
Ginger: All play and no work makes Ginger a swinging chick.
Painted like a television show “The Abductors” is probably one of the dumbest attempts at a franchise I’ve ever seen. Beginning on a very dark note involving sexual slavery and kidnap, director Don Schain then suddenly drops into light comedy with Ginger and her boss acting as a James Bond and M partnership with subtle flirting, and some goofy dialogue that’s written in short hand and makes for some awfully laughable preamble to Ginger’s next adventure. Ginger this time is on the track of a sexual slavery crime ring, a group of vicious men who steal women off the streets, destroy their property and force them into acting as sexual escorts for millionaires at the threat of torture. Ginger in all her swinging metropolitan allure is called in to investigate and penetrate this syndicate with hopes of rescuing a girl. After all, it’s women’s lib, and Ginger is about to kick some manimal ass.
Dirty Harry: Two Disc Special Edition (1971) (DVD)
Harry Callahan does all the dirty work. He does the dirty work that the people in the force wouldn’t do were it not for him. In the first half of “Dirty Harry,” he has to cut his lunch short and walk across the street in the middle of gun fire to stop a bank robber. And the cavalry is taking a while to get there and help him. He stops his eating, and is forced to single handedly put an end to the heist, and he goes back and finishes his lunch. He does it because he has to, because without him it all goes to shit. That’s Dirty Harry, the man with the magnum who sparked quite a controversy upon his introduction with many assuming he was an ode to, and endorsement for vigilantism and right wingers.
The Andromeda Strain (2008) (DVD)
They blew it up! Damn you! Damn you all to hell! Ah, Nuclear warheads, will we never learn? Shortly after “The Andromeda Strain” arrived to the A&E Networks last month, here we have the Special Edition DVD which is a shockingly great treatment for a television mini-series that just arrived. I know it’s not the first time a mini series gets a huge treatment, but you should see this. The casing is magnificent with a fold out front that allows you to read some of the content about it, and then there’s the DVD set which are two discs. I still don’t know why they split up the movie with two DVD’s bearing parts one and two, instead of just presenting the entire production as movie, I mean, that would make much more sense.
Ms. 45 (1981)
If there’s anything that gets my goat more than apocalypse films, and superhero films, it’s revenge flicks. Revenge movies make up some of the best cinema I’ve ever seen, from Samurai epics, to Western tales, and Abel Ferrera’s “Ms. 45” is that revenge movie in the vein of “I Spite on your Grave” where a woman who has suffered the crime of rape, now strikes out against all men, instead of the men who hurt her. Anna is a meek mute girl who designs clothes during the day time. On the way home, she’s anally raped on the street, and then staggers home wounded to find that a man has broken into her home and, angered that she has no valuables, decides to rape her… again.
Anna can’t catch a break, as you can imagine.
LEGO Indiana Jones: The Original Adventures (Nintendo DS)
Why even review a video game? Well, we’re such big fans of “Indiana Jones” and currently can’t put down the game based on the original three movies. So, without further ado, a review of the Nintendo DS version…
If you think this game is just for kids, then you’re freaking mistaken, pal. While it is rated E for everyone, there’s really nothing simplistic about this video game. It’s a complicated, irritating, and awfully long game that I am currently having a blast playing. I honestly can’t stop. And while completing “Raiders of the Lost Ark,” “Temple of Doom,” and “The Last Crusade” would take at least three days, if you played non-stop, finding the tricks, secrets, hidden gems, and strategy will force you to replay all three at least three times. The keyword here is three, folks.
Zombies Strippers! (2008)
Jay Lee tries his damndest to take porn star retiree (how long will that last?) Jenna Jameson and posits her as the next B movie scream queen a la Linnea Quigley or Debbie Rochon and I have to set it straight that Jameson will not be the next anything in horror. Any and all attempts to gain some sense of pop culture standing, beyond being a famous porn star have been fruitless and quixotic (her comic proved that). However, as a person who was excited about and interested in seeing “Zombie Strippers!” Jameson isn’t that bad here and that’s because Lee doesn’t ask much from her beyond name recognition.