If I told you that I thought “CHiPs” was a pretty good show, and that I sort of re-considered my whole notion that it was rather sucky, would you hold it against me? Just checking. Because lord help me, “CHiPs” wasn’t the worst series I’ve ever seen. This is probably because a few weeks ago I had to review the utterly painful “War at Home,” but hell, for what it’s worth, this series isn’t too bad.
Tag Archives: Crime
Scoop (2006)
After the painfully overrated “Match Point,” I was basically ready to welcome anything else that Allen could offer us. Sadly, going out of New York and onto the UK for his comedy thrillers has worked against Allen, and he’s pretty out of his element, as it becomes apparent with “Scoop.” All essence of genius and life is gone, and every one liner that Allen hurls our way manages to fall flatter and flatter to the point where it becomes rather pathetic. Especially when you consider the fact he’s now resorted to remaking his own movies, with “Scoop” being a loose remake of “Manhattan Murder Mystery.”
Spider-Man 3 (2007)
I have this theory that “Spider-Man 3” is Sam Raimi’s revenge on Sony Pictures. What leads me to that theory? Well, Raimi was likely forced to make the second sequel on a speedy time slot, he was likely bored with making another Spider-Man film on such a hectic schedule, and was forced to include Venom, a character he swore off when he took on the Spider-Man franchise. What’s interesting is that “Spider-Man 3” seems to prove many of my points at every turn, and it’s painful that I may be right.
Gangs of the Dead (Last Rites) (2006)
“Put on some news, I wanna hear about dead muthafuckas out there eating cops like it’s a barbecue!”
Yo son, check dis son, I’m from da Bronx son, and I just finished watching “Gangs of the Dead.” See, what makes “Gangs of the Dead” so clever is because it’s a double entendre, son. It ain’t just gangs of the dead, it’s gangs, as in groups of the dead. So it’s clever and not as stupid as y’all think. So I sat here wit ma forty, and laughed ma nuts off, while firing off ma glock. Naw, son, word is bond, I’m sick of zombie movies, son. The zombies in here, they all look like nothing but filthy hobos and alcoholics you see under the bridge in da streets. And wouldn’t you know it, now we got a bunch of black stereotypes being haunted by those flesh eating bastards, and I sit here trying to think of a reason not to turn ma glock on my head… son.
Vanishing Point (1971)
I know Tarantino would love to take the credit for the popularity and new found interest in “Vanishing Point,” thanks to his repeated references to the movie in his underrated “Death Proof,” but that’s simply presumptuous, considering many people have been singing the praises of “Vanishing Point” for years and years. It’s been deemed as the best car movie ever made, and is considered a pure cult classic, way before Chin McGee mentioned it on celluloid, and that’s a fact. “Vanishing Point” is really nothing but a one hundred minute car chase across country, and I loved every minute of it.
Sympathy for Mr. Vengeance (Boksuneun naui geot) (2002)
Perhaps I wasn’t paying attention, or perhaps I was just falling asleep after the first hour of nothing, but I couldn’t understand about sixty percent of what occurred in “Sympathy for Mr. Vengeance.” Whether or not Park actually tells the story jumping from different time to time, I’ll never know, because characters I thought died pop up later, and events that suddenly never happened, leads to something unexpected. Park’s story is awfully disjointed to the point where I couldn’t even catch up.
Hot Rods to Hell (1967)
“Hot Rods to Hell” is a youth gone wild, sixties morality tale about damn juvenile delinquents raising pure hell on Mr. and Mrs. Americana of the traditional Nuclear family. Before the real free revolution, “Hot Rods to Hell” was another glance at the youth tearing down good old fashioned America, and it was deemed much too risqué to play for television. Made for television, ironically, the studios shipped it out into theaters, and drive-ins and it’s quite a messy little clunker with an utterly simplistic plot. A mixture of “Beach Blanket Bingo,” “Last House on the Left,” and “Leave it to Beaver,” John Brahm’s “Hot Rods to Hell” sets down on a family called the Hills who go on a road trip to move to the desert. On the way there they come across a group of sadistic hot rodders who really want to make their lives a living hell from now on.