Let’s face it, Platinum Dunes is a remake factory that’s managed to take some of the best horror films of all time and completely butcher them. Take “Texas Chainsaw Massacre” for one example, a bastardized MTV version of a damn good dose of indie filmmaking. But surprisingly, “Friday the 13th” isn’t a bad film and Marcus Nispel completely redeems himself. In fact it’s pretty damn good. I know I’ve become the small minority of movie viewers who see the film as a great reboot, but I just clicked with “Friday the 13th” and everything it pushed on audiences including the mean vicious SOB that is Jason Voorhees.
Tag Archives: Remake
The Real Adventures of Jonny Quest: Season One, Volume One (DVD)
Going in to the official DVD release for “Jonny Quest” I couldn’t believe what they’d done with the treatment. There’s a beveled slip cover and a two disc edition with DVD faces that look immaculate. It’s a well deserved treatment because to this day I am baffled as to why this series never broke out on its own and became a hit. Perhaps audiences just didn’t care? Maybe the series wasn’t handled well enough. Or maybe the viewers were too young to understand the complex narrative and intricate characterization that made this series an instant favorite of mine. There may also be some contention at the very suggestively violent moments that included a man being impaled on elephant tusks and blood shed during fights with villains.
Friday the 13th (2009)
I think the only people who hold grudges more than Jason are the religious and it’s a known fact that Jason is one angry bitter man whose mom is taken down at the first five minutes of the 2009 reboot called simply: “Friday the 13th.” A combination of the first, second and third films in the series, “Friday the 13th” seek to completely redo Jason and start over with a clean slate. This is a great idea especially after desperation from studios forced the masked killer in to deep space and the future of mankind. This is a stripped down reboot that director Marcus Nispel handles with care, because it’s a task liable to be screwed up once he and the writers decide on fitting an origin, a motivation, and the discovery of the hockey mask in only ninety minutes. But he rises to the occasion and actively keeps the story moving with a body count of almost ten people and an admittedly uneven pace. Despite the caveat and probably because of it, Nispel’s treatment of Voorhes makes for the first enjoyable experience at the movies in a long while.
Cinema Crazed's Worst 10 of 2008
10. Space Chimps
You know, movie geeks make a lot of noise about films in theaters that are great and barely ever receive the attention crap like “Meet Dave” does, but every so often when a new movie scarcely gathers any kind of promotion at all, there’s a reason for it. A damn good reason. And “Space Chimps” is that prime example that some studios may hold films back because they’re just terrible and barely watchable. Cheap animation and a virtually non-existent plot pretty much destroy any semblance of potential this one-note premise has from the starting gates, as “Space Chimps” only clocks in at a lean eighty minutes and feels endless with its horrible voice acting, lame gags, and a twist in the second half that is not only surprising but clumsy in its delivery as if the writers just didn’t know where to go creatively after the chimps were actually in space. I always enter in to an animated film with a healthy sense of optimism (I even gave “Doogal” a chance!) but in a summer that brought us “Wall-E,” talking chimps and NASA propaganda simply doesn’t cut it for me.
Shutter (2008)
Here’s what I learned from watching the remake of “Shutter”:
1. Even purely Asian women look Caucasian only because they should.
2. There are such things as spirit photography magazines.
3. There are experts in spirit photography.
4. Ghosts love a good game of piggyback!
5. And Maya Hazen is a stone cold fox.
Death Race (2008)
The world is in shambles. The country is on the brink of depression. Millions are out of work. Violence is now considered entertainment. Convicts are now reduced to television stars for our own sick amusement. And we’re now on the brink of revolting against a corrupt disgusting government run by a madman. But enough about modern times, right now we have “Death Race”! A film that barely covers any of those issues beyond using it as a back drop for the basis of the death racing, where as Corman’s original was so ahead of its time, it perfectly encapsulates what this generation is all about and it was made in the seventies!
Funny Games U.S. (2008) (DVD)
I recently watched “The Strangers” in theaters, and it was a thriller very heavily reminiscent of “Funny Games” in where our villains simply are. And the studios heavily marketed on the momentum from Haneke’s film to make it seem like a branch off from “Funny Games.” That’s likely because with both films our villains remain ambiguous. I never understood why we have to know the motives of our villains in horror films, these days. Why do we need to know about their life, or tragedy, and why do they need to have a theme of revenge or financial gain? Why can’t they just be psychopathic murderers who simply crossed you and seek to kill you?