Matthew Saliba is an interesting gentleman. So far his film works have been heavily mired in giallo and exploitation, while presenting his shorts in a myriad of beautifully rendered photographs that tell more of a story than most short films. And if that’s not the kicker he offers up his own interpretation of a Grindhouse classic: “Vampyros Lesbos.” I’m not a big fan of the grindhouse original, but I was very much open to see what Saliba had to offer. As a photographer and director he can tell a damn strong story. Not to mention there be lesbians and vampire lesbians in this, so I saw this as soon as I received it. “Vampyros Lesbos” is an utterly ambitious interpretation from the outset presenting a demonstration not just in sexuality, but orgasmic storytelling told through a series of photographs that rely more on human expression and soul instead of acting ability.
Tag Archives: Remake
Funny Games U.S. (2008)
The entire time I was observing the villains in Haneke’s remake of “Funny Games,” I could only ironically think back to the monologue Tim Roth gave in the opening of “Pulp Fiction.” His story about a man who robbed a bank over the phone by claiming he’d shoot a child, while the bank was never sure if there was ever actually a child was reminiscent of the two young men who could have posed a threat to the couple and their child here. There’s never an actual indication that they’re harmful in the beginning, nor is there an indication of their deadly capability until coerced with difficulty by their victims, there’s only the possibility, and sometimes that’s all people need to incite petrifying fear in a stranger.
One Missed Call (2008) (DVD)
It’s attack of the murderous Razr’s: the remake, in what is easily one of the worst horror movies of 2008, one of the worst movies of 2008, and one of the worst remakes of all time. And that’s not hyperbole, suckers. The remake of the 2003 Takashe Miike horror film stars a veritable cast of B listers dragging us through the doldrums of bland performances, limp tension, and a series of jump scares that go to ridiculous lengths to keep audiences awake; how else to explain a shock from a deafening asthma inhaler, and a falling marionette puppet?
April Fool's Day (2008)
It’s all a practical joke in the end. What? You’re mad that I ruined the twist? Too bad. Now let’s cut the crap here, I’m not going to pretend “April Fool’s Day” was a masterpiece of eighties horror cinema, because it wasn’t. It was boring, bland, and had a climax that was as predictable as it could get. It’s called “April Fool’s Day,” the surprise twist is given off the bat. So when news came that it was being remade, I had a general series of reactions. Anger that they’d be remaking another movie, disappointment that they couldn’t improve on the original, and sheer frustration that it had been geared to the “My Super Sweet 16” audiences now focusing on a group of rich kids. Now as much as I love to see Buffy and Muffy heiress get an axe in the head, this new set up is annoying because it’s pointless. “April Fool’s Day” is a blip on the remake radar and for good reason. It’s a low budget redo by terrible directors, and yes, we’re setting down on some rich folkels.
Day of the Dead (2008)
As a buddy once said: The Only thing worse than a bad horror movie is a boring horror movie, and “Day of the Dead (2008)” unfortunately didn’t bore me. In fact I had fun in a guilty pleasure mindset watching these idiotic zombies adhering to whatever principle that would grant story progression. As well, these zombies are much more energetic and entertaining than the ones in the “Resident Evil” movie incarnations for the fact that they actually act like zombies and provide some sense of menace and terror even when they’re bursting into flames and withering out like cigarette ash.
The Bridge to Terabithia (2007)
Anna Sophia Robb and Josh Hutcherson give strong performances as the two heroes of the tale who find connection with one another in a school that’s basically locked them out socially. Jess is a bullied outcast, and Leslie is a free spirited thinker who is instantly a target for bullying once she displays individual thought. The performances from the child actors had me at attention and they both deliver their characters with great talent. Hutcherson’s take on the conflicted and neglected artist is often times heart wrenching, while Leslie is an quickly sympathetic heroine who we want to see more of as the time goes on her. Robb has a wide-eyed innocence about her that makes her the perfect compliment to the principle cast.
Cinema Crazed's Worst 10 of 2007
10. Blood & Chocolate
It’s a shame that the movies with the most interesting concepts always end up sucking the most. I looked forward to “Skinwalkers” and from the looks of it, it was a failure, and the same goes for “Blood & Chocolate” a film that is just nothing more than spin off of Anne Rice’s shtick turning werewolves into cheesy Goths who battle over women and hunt people in the woods for no real apparent reason. And like a bad Saturday morning cartoon they transform by the light of a rainbow and all of their clothes and jewelry also transforms with them. There’s also the director’s attempts to mimick Parkour by having his characters running and bouncing off of walls with their feet for no reasons at all. For all intents and purposes Agnes Bruckner is still a fox, but this movie is more of her wasted potential.