I don’t want to live in the world presented on “Return of the Living Dead”. Not because of the zombies. Because zombies, man… they scare me. But because people are stupid in the world of ROTLD. Really stupid. There’s a big rave and no one can notice people being attacked, or getting their scalps torn from the roots while undead people feast on the gooey insides because–hey, it’s a party, anything can happen. Let me tell you, I can notice when someone has burnt themselves with a cigarette (which is usually funny within itself) in a crowded street, so I think I’d notice someone having their head torn open by someone’s teeth, even in a crowded room with blaring music on a constant loop, but then again this is an extremely low-budget set of sequels to a classic zombie series. Sheesh, Ellory Elkayem, you were so good at comedy in “Eight Legged Freaks”–what happened?!
Tag Archives: Zombies
Ring of Darkness (2004)
If anything, “Ring of Darkness” finally confirms my seven year long suspicions, that boy bands are really satanic flesh-eating zombies. I’ve known it since N’Sync burst on to the scene, I mean how else can you explain the popularity- however fleeting–of Justin Timberlake? I figured they were either demons or gay. The film begins with an Abercrombie and Fitch looking young man attempting to escape under the cover of the late evening. He escapes through a window–but not before putting on his platinum medallion–and is cornered by four shadowy figures and killed. “Ring of Darkness”–whatever the hell that title means–is a possible sign that the “reality” craze has actually seeped on to movies.
Zombies in my Neighborhood (2005)
I’m not that bright sometimes, I admit it. I know what you’re saying “Felix, it can’t be true”, but I’m being honest, I’m not as utterly intelligent and charming as I look to you. Sometimes a joke is so subtle, I don’t get it. Again you’re gasping and thinking “My god, he’s mad he IS charming and intelligent”, but it’s true, my friends. Either way “Zombies in my Neighborhood” is basically proof to my sad admittance. “Zombies in my Neighborhood” is the making of a film that–will never happen. Thus is the joke. Which I didn’t catch on to.
Day of the Dead 2: Contagium (2005)
It’s hard to take a film like this seriously; as a matter of fact calling this a film is very funny in its assumption, but regardless, taking this seriously is a real stretch and requires somewhat of a straight face. My suggestion is to completely shut off any expectations, logic, and common sense and try to make it through the ninety minute crap fest, now there’s an endurance challenge. Be warned though, this is not a sequel in spite of its title; it seeks only to shamelessly market off of the name of Romero’s masterpiece, and it bears no connection other than the title alludes to. While Romero’s film was a brilliant dissection of military corruption and paranoia, this crap fest is just an endurance test of sheer taste and torment.
George A. Romero’s Land of the Dead (2005)
It’s here. It’s finally here. After waiting and waiting and waiting, it’s finally here, and I could not be happier if I tried. I went in to the theater with my stomach in knots, not only because zombies scare me, but because I was so excited and thrilled to see Romero open a can of whoop ass on the newcomers and show them how to make a horror film, and he did it right. Thank goodness. When we first open with “Land” Romero is already beginning to play with us, firstly by showing us the deteriorating world before our very eyes, and then we gaze on to the walking dead whom are looming around a graveyard as the humans watch them. Romero opens on a tense note with the radio reports and slowly decaying world and then we enter in to the madness.
Romero is brilliance incarnate, not only for creating a genre on to itself, but simply for the fact that he knows how to tell a story, and even in the films small ninety minute window, it’s still a damn good story in the end. But there’s a problem now. The zombies… they’re getting smarter. For people expecting zombies to talk, run, drive cars, and go on monologues, well then you’re mistaken, Romero doesn’t go that far. Romero is a genius simply for the fact that instead of giving us the same stuff again and again, he decides, no, he’s going to mix it up a bit. An artist doesn’t give us the same painting over and over, an artist experiments, and what madman Romero is doing is mixing it up, he’s playing with his concept.
Like the humans who evolved from primates to intelligent beings (for the most part), zombies are beginning to experience a gradual evolution as well, which has just made it a lot harder for the humans to survive in the wasteland we call Earth. Romero explores new concepts with the zombies that many fans will not like, but I loved. The most drastic being Big Daddy. Let’s talk about Big Daddy. One of the reasons why Romero is so critically praised is because most of his dead films feature smart heroes or smart villains whom are predominantly ethnic. Ben (NOTLD), Peter (DOTD), and even Big Daddy are smarter than everyone else and make it out alive–debatably. Romero denies it ever being intentional, but to accomplish such an innovative feat unintentionally is genius in itself.
Eugene Clark is a scene stealer as a zombie who catches on and becomes the unofficial messiah of the walking dead and the entirety of the film is comprised of the mercenaries battling among one another, and the zombies whom have learned to think and group together and are quickly on their way to Fiddler’s Green, a veritable safe haven of the sorts. I loved Big Daddy personally, simply because it’s a new direction. Much like Bub, Romero dares to take one of his creatures and add a soul to them. Big Daddy is dressed as the common man, but becomes much more than that (poetic, isn’t it?) as he teaches his other friends how to get what they want and faster. Big Daddy does not talk, nor does he drive a car, but much like an ape, he grunts and growls tilting his head and pointing at objects while he learns the usefulness of handheld weapons.
The theme of a man who was a gas station attendant, probably a dot in the grand scheme of life, rising as the undead to lead others to the promise land to topple an empire was a brilliant touch for Romero who explores other ideas with his creation. Each zombie has their own little personality, and they manage to steal the show in what is Romero’s grand comeback. And to the hardcore fans of the Dead series, Romero does not fail to include his trademark brand of dark humor, whether it be a zombie eating himself, the zombie band, or a jab at civilization, there are gags with the zombies that are so subtle it’s hard to catch. As for the human characters we’re given an immense array of personalities and characters we can just root for and pick sides with. As with “Night”, “Day”, and most essentially “Dawn”, we have a bunch of different personalities that clash and co-exist, and the acting is so well done.
Whether it’s the scene-stealing Robert Joy as the mentally disabled, but incredibly sharp-shooting Charlie, to the luscious Asia Argento as Slack, right to Simon Baker who is great as good guy Riley, and Pedro Miguel Arce as Pillsbury, there is just character after character we can get to know and root for. My personal favorite though is Cholo played by the often good John Leguizamo. Admittedly, I was very pessimistic on his casting simply because Leguizamo is a mainstream actor and not someone I would picture in a horror film, but he surprises me ending up becoming my favorite character. Cholo, meaning lower-class, is not so much a villain, but an antagonist who is just desperate to become upperclassmen, but is constantly being manipulated by the upper-class to do their bidding and gets nothing in return.
Cholo is the blue collared man looking to make it big in the world of industry, though you know he doesn’t stand a chance. Then there’s Dennis Hopper who plays politician and high class self-imposed emperor Kaufman who rules over Fiddler’s Green, a high rise that houses the rich while the poor must live below amidst the ghettos. Kaufman is the politician of today, a commentary on elitism who runs things and never lets the little guy have his dues. Cholo steals the humongous war tank “Dead Reckoning” and demands he get let in to Fiddler’s Green or he’ll blow it to pieces. Fiddler’s Green is the paradise of kings run like a utopia with high priced alcohol, the rich living it up and doing their work, while constant announcements boasting positive messages blare in the background every minute.
Romero gives yet another another jab at consumerism with the high class drinking and scrounging for food, while Kaufman represents the more Rumsfeld/Bush allegorical politician even muttering “We do not negotiate with terrorists” at one point. That’s provoking commentary only Romero can give us. Meanwhile, those hoping to see gore galore will not be disappointed by this experience. Greg Nicotero and KNB are at the top of their game here. Unlike the Dawn remake–we actually see people getting eaten! And Romero doesn’t cut away or pussy out, we see leg munching, intestine gorging, arm chewing, neck tearing, and oh so much more, it’s a delight.
In the end I was left with a big smile on my face, and warmth in my heart that Romero has finally given the true horror fans what we’ve been wanting for so long. The horror genre is dying and Romero gave it the small dose of adrenaline is sorely needed. This is how you make a fucking zombie movie, Hollywood, and it’s a great addition to the Dead Series. At only ninety-three minutes, “Land” sure is rushed. The film never settles down to tell us the story we’ve been waiting to see told from the first three films, instead it just continues on constant events without ever bothering to present us with character emphases, and the epic themes we’ve been so accustomed to.
Romero spoiled his fans and fails to spoil us further with the worldwide epic story we’ve been seeing for the past three films. Which is most of the reason why we don’t see enough of Asia Argento and Dennis Hopper. I wanted to see more of Asia simply for aesthetic purposes, her character Slack was never fleshed out enough, and as with Hopper, his full on menace is never presented in as much of the glory I expected. Though flawed on story and lacking the epic feel I was accustomed to, “Land of the Dead” is a welcome change to the horror slump. Romero is back and just as good as he was then providing a scary, action-packed, well acted addition to the epic dead series.
Dawn of the Dead (1978)
“Dawn of the Dead” while taking off from its predecessor “Night of the Living Dead”, is also symbolic of the dawn of the apocalypse. It’s the dawn of a new civilization, the dawn of the apocalypse, the dawn of the end of humanity, and the dawn of the time. It’s where the end of Western civilization has been realized and Romero displays much of the shocking sentiment and storytelling ingeniously. Romero is a brilliant storyteller because not only can he tell a very shocking tale, he can also make audiences think beneath the horror. The zombies are more than cannibalistic corpses, they’re also symbolic of humanity. In all four chapters, the walking dead take on a new definition and message as to what Romero is trying to convey to his audience. Romero isn’t all horror when it comes to the Dead films, there are actual stories and plot points laid out for the audience. “Dawn” takes place on an undisclosed time after “Night of the Living Dead” where the dead have managed to spread out from the country side.
Now the invasion has managed to become a worldwide epidemic and literally means the collapse of civilization. Where as the remake’s carnage was quick, this focuses on a more realistic invasion in which the epidemic is slow and sporadic and then meant the crumbling of the world without any hope. In the film, four survivors, Fran a television station technician, and Stephen a helicopter pilot steal the station’s copter and decide to make a break for it but first decide to rescue Stephen’s friends. After an unsuccessful raid of an apartment complex where the residents have been storing their undead loved ones, Roger and Peter, two sharp shooting SWAT members high tail it with the couple to re-fuel. In a rather tense sequence, and stop off at the Monroeville mall where they hope to retrieve the supplies needed. While there, they’re able to exterminate most of the zombies untouched and steal the supplies they want, but they decide it’d be a perfect place to set up camp. They hide at the top undiscovered, and are able to clear the top floor and have their pick of the stores, but soon as cabin fever takes over, they find it’s not such a utopia after all.
The mall itself not only becomes a twisted cornucopia of resources, and a Utopia, but it also becomes its own character, an entity that decides the fate of these four characters within this closed in mall. All four live in the mall and the outside world is pretty much gone to shit in the handbag regardless of how much denial people inhabit. Such is shown during the Southern lynch mobs whom are partying and hunting down the zombies. Little do they know the world has ended. Romero’s zombies are representative of the consumer culture at the time that is still very resonant in this day and age of greed and consumption. The zombie’s fight the survivor’s, not only to get at them to eat them, but they fight them for the mall. Though most of the characters aren’t aware of this, Peter, the unofficial leader of the group, explains they want the mall just to walk around in, because it’s what they did when they were alive. The zombies have no use for the products and have no need for material possessions yet still defend and try to re-claim the mall for their own purposes simply out of reflex. The human mind is so conditioned to consume and spend, even after death we’re still roaming the stores and trying to get to jewelry and money.
Even the survivors whom have no needfor material possessions beside food still linger the stores, try on clothing and drool at the sight of money which has no basic function any longer. Romero’s rule for a zombie movie: it’s about characters surrounded by zombies, not about zombies. That’s been the major fault with a lot of the rip-offs of the modern horror age. Zombie films are all about zombies without any characters to know or root for. “Dawn” is comprised of some truly layered individuals in the personas of the four main characters here. Peteris the strong ethnic theme resonant through Romero’s dead films who unofficially leads the three survivors and runs the show. Ken Foree pulls off a convincing performance as Peter the conflicted leader who always tries to keep things straight. There’s Stephen the pilot who isn’t sure of himself and constantly finds himself in trouble due to trying to keep up with the two sharpshooters. He’s not the handiest man around, but David Emgee portrays him with real heart; there’s Fran, the female of the group who must evolve in to a survivor, as Peter demande.
Finally, there’s my absolute favorite character Roger the headstrong loose cannon of the foursome whose great with the gun and knows how to handle himself. Scott Reiniger gives a tough grizzled performance and most of the time looks like a cast member from the show SWAT who accidentally drifted on to the film. He’s a great anti-hero who kept my attention for most of the movie. The four have an eclectic energy and electric chemistry as they work together to try and create peace within the confines of the mall but find it very difficult as a biker gang destroys everything in the gory climax. Most of the film is devoted to actual storytelling as we watch the foursome deal with impatience, cabin fever, and restlessness that can’t be settled. Romero perpetuates that tension in to some unsettling atmosphere leading to the shocking climax.
“Dawn” is a pure horror masterpiece that sets the bar that still has yet to be surpassed in quality, class, and shocks. Few horror films can stand the test of time, but some horror films are like fine wine and only increase in value as they age, and “Dawn of the Dead” is in a rare league of ingenious horror films that are utterly timeless. “Dawn” is the original article and a true example of resourcefulness, subtext, pure storytelling and shocking gore that still holds up very well even in today’s age of flash, and CGI. I love it.
All Soul's Day: Dia De Los Muertos (2005)
Here’s a rather hilarious predicament for “All Soul’s Day”. Stay with me: in the film, the town are celebrating Dio De Los Muertos which means in English “Day of the Dead”, now this is a film including cannibalistic zombies… you see where the predicament lies? How to make a zombie film revolving around the holiday “Day of the Dead”, yet not being able to call it that at risk of being compared to the famous zombie film “Day of the Dead”, or risking copyright infringement. Amazing, even when the Scifi channel aren’t even trying, they’re ripping off other people’s shit. But, trust me, at this point, Scifi would benefit in being compared to “Day of the Dead”, though don’t think I didn’t see the small hints at the title around the movie!