While I did ultimately enjoy “X-Men: First Class” as a film, I found myself giggling at the very opening. I found myself giggling for the simple fact that we finally are given a biographical detailing of Magneto. You know, the one we were supposed to get with a feature film but never did? I love how the writers manage to sneak in his biography while also chronicling the story of two powerful gentlemen with vastly different ideals. Because at the end of the day, the real story behind “X-Men: First Class” is the brotherhood of ideas, and the views on mankind that separate us in spite of common goals.
Category Archives: Movie Reviews
The Cheerleaders (1973)
I remember watching “The Cheerleaders” on skinemax back in the mid-nineties when they were never afraid to expose audiences to the delights of the grindhouse sub-culture. “The Cheerleaders” is one of my favorite bits of grindhouse fare ever made, a bonafide entry in the rare cheersploitation sub-sub genre that explores the lives of a group of jail bait teenagers who partake in lustful delights as a form of sexual expression. Particularly there’s jail bait Stephanie Fondue who is the Lolita of the group, indulging in group activities when the occasion calls for it. “The Cheerleaders” actually has a hilarious and clever premise to it, and one that will stretch in to two more movies.
Take Me Home Tonight (2011)
“Take Me Home Tonight” operates on the basis that we still give a squat about the eighties and thanks to the financial failure that was this film in early 2011, it’s great to hear America isn’t budging in their resounding boredom with the decade. This was only further remedied by “MacGruber” and its eighties crapola that touted the same sentiment “Take Me Home Tonight” does. Director Michael Dowse’s film doesn’t so much want to be a coming of age film from the eighties so much as it wants to be an eighties film. It takes every chance to define itself as the decade love letter that it almost convinces itself that it’s a movie ripped from that decade.
Passion Play (2011)
Director Mitch Glazer’s film is probably one of the funniest most pretentious art house flicks of the year. It’s one of the stupidest pieces of utter tripe ever conceived by man, an almost satirical look at artsy fartsy that dabbles in to a premise so ridiculous it’s barely competent enough be considered symbolic. Oh Megan Fox is a bird girl named Lily, but she doesn’t want to be a bird girl, but she’s so beautiful! Mickey Rourke wants to restore her beauty by keeping her wings in tact even though she destroys them every night, all the while confronting wandering Indians who come to his rescue, evil old carnies and the like, all of whom are obviously some form of delusions of grandeur by some coked up cowboy played by Rourke who stumbles through the film with a grumble.
Savage Streets (1984)
“Savage Streets” is one of my favorite Linda Blair Trash fests, a bona fide grind house spectacular that examines the plight of over privileged white kids who all pose as gangs upon night fall. The streets of surburbia become savage every night with the screeches and howls and Danny Steinmann’s youth gone wild cinematic trip is an exploration in to the aimlessness of this crime spree two groups of youths embark on. Part “The Warriors,” and part “The Outsiders,” there is even John Vernon to tangle with, who makes it his mission to take down the group of men terrorizing the school with drug deals.
The Hangover Part II (2011)
It’s nice the producers of “The Hangover 2” loved the original so much they gave us the same movie again except in Bangkok. Unoriginal sentiment? Yes, but “The Hangover 2” deserves it for being an unoriginal movie. Unusually dark and lacking in the adventurous tone the original possessed, “The Hangover 2” is essentially the same formula except switched and mismatched for the audience to believe they’re watching something new. Of course, I put myself in to the mindset of the writers and wondered where else they could have gone with the sequel. It’s called “The Hangover,” there was a first movie about a hangover, and now we’re back to the sequel which will deal with what exactly? A hangover, I presume.
YellowBrickRoad (2011)
Anyone who is anyone knows that if there is a legend that is set in the woods you never go looking for it to find out of it holds any logical weight in this reality. We’ve seen this movie a thousand times already, but that doesn’t mean it’s not worthy of a watch as directors Jesse Holland and Andy Mitton put together a classic horror yarn that mixes documentary footage with live action footage.

