Cecil B. DeMented (2000)

You think you’ve seen and heard it all in your life. And then you realize that the homicidal cult of psychotic movie freaks who are intended to be the twisted villains of this John Waters pic, are people you tend to agree with. I agreed with  everything these psychos screamed from beginning to end, and that’s frightening. I admit that. Now lock me up before I do something rash in the name of good filmmaking. I’ve not always been a fan of John Waters films, particularly his dark comedies, but with “Cecil B. Demented” I was surprised to see that not only did he concoct a damn fine movie, but he also manages to convey obsession for the film  medium that’s amped thirty percent into the sociopathic circle (Look for Maggie Gyllenhaal in a funny performance as a sadistic goth).

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Grave of the Fireflies (Hotaru No Haka) (1988)

As an uncle, as a brother, the oldest of three, and as a son, “Grave of the Fireflies” was a grueling film to sit through. Being a victim of a horrible sequence of events and watching your loved one fade away is something I’m all too familiar with. Watching “Grave of the Fireflies,” possibly the most heart-breaking film I’ve seen in years, you will know what that’s like too. Isao Takahatacreates a film that doesn’t need ghouls and goblins and fairies. It’s all frightening enough.

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Rocky Balboa (2006)

rocky-balboa-2006

“Rocky Balboa” would work better if seen after “Rocky.” This man at the top of his game earns the love of his life, to which we turn to “Rocky Balboa” where this man is now a wash out, with no family, and the love of his life dead. It would make much more of an impact. What occurs is Rocky not trying to reclaim his fame, but prove he can have one last go around before he properly fades away into the darkness to live out the rest of his life and die. What Stallone also tackles is the rampant ageism in America. Can a man in his late fifties still do what he did in his early thirties? Can a man be robbed of what he wants because of his age?

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The Roost (2004)

roostWhat are bats? Flying rats who shit on you while flying off. What is “The Roost”? A flying piece of shit. Same difference, don’t you think? Actually, when I finished “The Roost,” I think watching seventy minutes of stock footage with bats would have been much more thrilling than Ti West’s horror indie. I can just imagine the brain storming for this junk with West trying to sell it:

Producer: So, what’s it about?
West: Four people on the road…
Producer: Oh god.
West: Discover an abandoned farm house.
Producer: Oh geez.
West: Will you let me finish?
Producer: Fine.
West: They discover an abandoned farm house, and are attacked by ravenous bats!
Producer: Okay…?
West: And they flutter, and tear your face apart! Gah!
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The Ringer (2005)

the-ringer-2005--00I liked “The Ringer.” I liked it a lot. Because, in spite of the jack ass from “Jackass” starring, and the potential for a complete cheapening of the Special Olympics, every opportunity this film had to spit in our faces, it didn’t. The controversy behind this was pointless. Because, in spite of the previews, “The Ringer” really isn’t a cheap comedy. The mentally disabled pictured here are not comedy props for fart jokes, and they’re not caricatures, or objects to laugh at. I just didn’t understand the controversy behind “The Ringer.” Maybe it was bad press for the sake of hype, or perhaps just more morons making a fuss over a film they haven’t seen just yet, but when I was finished, I didn’t see the big deal. It’s not just some shitty comedy from Tom Green, and it didn’t warrant any sort of hype in the end.

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Pan’s Labyrinth (El Laberinto Del Fauno) (2006)

In a world filled with boy wizards, and dragons, every time I think the fantasy world is dead, there’s always someone who swoops in to reclaim the throne and show us that indeed the fantasy genre is still alive and well. All it needs is much imagination and no derivation. It’s not a hard concept to grasp, and it’s not a hard task to accomplish. Every time I receive an opposing argument on that declaration, two words will come from my lips: “Pan’s Labyrinth.” This would be the part where I’d compare this to fodder like “Legend,” and “Alice in Wonderland,” but Del Toro’s film is one of its own kind. Much like Del Toro’s previous “The Devil’s Backbone,” “Pan’s Labyrinth” is unlike anything you can imagine watching.

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Undead (2005)

undead-originalSmall town, hapless folks, average day, and a comet. All of which are the menu for a brutally satirical zombie film known by horror fans as “Undead.” The low budget Aussie production has become renowned among horror fans as one of the better zombie films to come around in years, and they’d be right. Aside from the masterpiece “Shaun of the Dead,” The Spierig Brother’s film manages to be both creepy, and utterly twisted a concept hard to accomplish with zombie fare now an utterly tired genre. What occurs in “Undead” is the typical, yet unpredictable. A bunch of comets crash in a small town, and now all the residents have become brain eating zombies—don’t you hate when that happens? Now, the remaining survivors, a bunch of officers, a model, a pregnant nurse, and a bayou hunter, have to find their way out and figure out how to stop the epidemic.

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