Apparently, the hype from “The Cave” and the proceeding negative reviews for it really were up to par with what the film had to offer. As always, in spite of bad reviews, I put up hope that “The Cave” would turn out to be a fun, exciting, tense film, but I was proven wrong again. And let me tell you, after “The Descent” this is nothing but child’s play, a recreation in spite of coming out almost at the same time as Marshall’s horror fest.
Category Archives: Movie Reviews
The Talent Given Us (2004)
This was in Sundance? This? This crap? So, how does one get a bad film in to Sundance? Well, you first film the movie on a handheld camera to give it a real indie look, then you cast your parents because all these self-indulgent “artists” cast their relatives, but you don’t stop there, you cast your sisters and their friends, and then you write a script and then let your two main stars bicker at one another improvising just to make it look cool, and then to make it conventional, you have two people whom look like they’ve never been outside their neighborhood take a cross country road trip where they happen to come across their friends on this trip.
The Aristocrats (2005) (DVD)
Now for the record, I’ve heard the joke told on this film months before its actual release, and I have my own version I tell that involves a baby, a small girl, and a lot of piss. But I digress. The thing you must know about this joke is that it’s not about the punch line, it’s the descriptions within the lead up to the punch line. It’s not that funny of a joke, you won’t even laugh, but the description is the genius. The set up: “A man walks in to a Vaudeville agents office and says: ‘Boy, do I have an act for you!'” and thus begins one of the most vile jokes ever told.
Sophie Scholl: The Final Days (Sophie Scholl – Die letzten Tage) (2005)
In 1943, German teens Sophie and Hans Scholl, and Christoph Probst along with many others, were convicted of crimes against their country during the end of the second world war. Sophie, Hans, and Christoph were convicted and executed after being caught distributing leaflets and pamphlets speaking out against Hitler and his army. What’s depicted in “Sophie Scholl” is the utterly heroic and courageous war fought by these three people to survive and send out their messages of impending defeat to the Nazi’s. “Sophie Scholl” is a brilliant and utterly magnificent exploration not only in to the battle of these freedom fighters, but also an insightful glance at the last breath of the Nazi regime. I insist I’ve yet to see an awful depiction of the holocaust, and I stand by it. “Sophie Scholl” can be added to that list as one of the best depictions of Nazi wrath, and defiance ever made. It’s a masterpiece, pure and simple.
Grizzly Man (2005)
I’ve constantly heard “Grizzly Man” in contrast with a train wreck. It’s miserable, but you just have to keep watching for some odd reason, and that’s a dead on summarizing of this film. It’s a train wreck, but a compelling one. Director Werner Herzog explores wildlife enthusiast Timothy Treadwell through much footage of his exploration of woods and commuting with his favorite animals, the bears. All of the clips are morbid reflections of a man content with his surroundings and desperately attempting to unify with nature. The film is morbid because it explores tapes from Treadwell leading up to his inevitable death (Tim’s friend even recalls when he discovered the mangled bodies, or what was left of them). He and his girlfriend were mauled to death and eaten by the same grizzlies he’d grown to love, and though Herzog doesn’t show the deaths, it’s still compelling to watch this man implode.
Wallace & Gromit in The Curse of the Were-Rabbit (2005)
A couple of months before I was able to grab a hold of a copy of “Were-rabbit”, I was able to catch on television the three shorts of the adventures of “Wallace and Gromit”. They’re three claymation shorts that earned a massive cult following. Usually, it’s very hip to say that anything nominated for an Oscar isn’t that good, but “Wallace and Gromit” is one of those Oscar properties that really did get the praise it deserved. Trust when I say this, Wallace and Gromit is far from overrated.
Through the Fire (2006)
I’m no sports fan. I find no interest in sports, and I really don’t watch it, but “Through the Fire” is not about sports. You don’t have to like sports to know how damn good this is. It’s typical to say such a thing, but as a man who hasn’t seen a full basketball game in eleven years, it says something about the sheer quality and excellence of “Through the Fire”, that it was able to grab a hold of me and keep me glued to the screen. It’s not an insider documentary, it’s not a new look at sports, and it is not an exploitative peek at a man who ruined himself. It’s simply a down to Earth story about a young man who worked for his dreams and achieved them.