Oh no! A woman! She has no testicles! She’s going to PMS all over us! What a wacky new dynamic in the Expendables! What’s up for part three? A dog? Kids? I wish “The Expendables 2” was a great follow up to the fun original film, but sadly it isn’t. It has this idea that including a woman in the group will somehow stir things and create tension, but it feels hackneyed and ancient. Plus, with a female version of “The Expendables” waiting in the wings, this plot device feels forced and trite. It also sadly feels like a way to derail a lot of the homoerotic tension between Jason Statham and Sly Stallone’s characters, and that’s a shame. Their bromance makes for some good dialogue and interplay, and to wedge a woman in between them feels like over compensation of the worst form.
Django Unchained (2012)
In the tradition of “The Legend of Nigger Charley,” and “Boss Nigger,” director Quentin Tarantino tips his hat to the exploitation cinema of the seventies with his own epic tale of slavery, freedom, and avenging those that have been unjustly murdered. Quite possibly Tarantino’s boldest and most courageous cinematic undergoing, “Django Unchained” is yet again another wonderful love letter to classic exploitation cinema, and one that Tarantino revels in soaking with adoration, providing viewers with one of the few African American western heroes with a back story that taps in to the tropes of the hero’s journey. While many did decry “Django Unchained” as exploitative and hyper violent, Tarantino definitely has his finger on the pulse and knows full well what immortalized the classic blaxploitation westerns. They thrived on hyper violence and slavery revenge fantasies and Tarantino holds nothing back with a relentlessly violent and entertaining love letter to his favorite sub-genre.
Quentin Tarantino's "Django Unchained" Original Motion Picture Soundtrack (Digital)
Whether or not you love Tarantino’s movies, one thing you have to give him credit for is his ability to include some incredible music in every one of his films. He’s introduced me to some excellent songs over the years from the Smith version of “Baby it’s You” played in “Death Proof,” right down to “Stuck in the Middle with You” from “Reservoir Dogs.”
With “Django Unchained” it’s no real exception. The film is admittedly anachronistic in its soundtrack since the film is essentially a nod to the blaxploitation westerns of the seventies.
LOL (2012)
In vogue bright eyed teen stars are a dime a dozen in America, and they have a shorter shelf life than a can of beans. Often times a teen star can rise and fade before anyone even remembers their name, and it’s a struggle to fight for career success beyond being young and beautiful. What’s worse is teen stars are more and more presenting talent and aren’t the manufactured product that Disney keeps churning out. Miley Cyrus has shown beyond a shadow of a doubt that, like most teen Disney stars the studio churns out year after year, she’s pretty much fading in to the background.
Our Top Five Jim Henson Characters
When I was a kid, Jim Henson was my absolute hero. He invented so many of my childhood characters, he pioneered some of my favorite television shows of all time, did so many great voices for various incredible characters, and voiced my favorite character all time, Kermit the Frog. So when he passed away it was a somber and heartbreaking occasion for me. I remember sitting through the memorial song played on television where the muppets are contemplating Henson’s death and I couldn’t even sit through it. Mid-way I literally got up and left putting the television on mute, barely able to come to terms with Henson’s passing. It felt like my grandfather, who spent so many years telling me great stories and inventing this magical world was gone. It was yet another artist going away forever.
The muppets and Sesame Street were never the same again. Sure they can pretend they rebounded, but when Jim died, everything else did, and universe for these characters was just completely pointless and oozing consumerism. Characters were no longer there to tell stories, they were just there to sell merchandise. One of the many reasons why i utterly despised and continue to despise Elmo. Seriously, I loathe that character more than Mickey an the entire cast of “Family Guy” combined. Since his death and my introduction to his work, Henson has been one of the major influences on my life inspiring my love for impressions and voices, and for creating my own characters, and I had to pay homage to the man, the legend, Jim Henson.
Continue reading
Resident Evil: Retribution (2012)
The first mistake “Retribution” makes is that it assumes people actually care about the story. Not to make an assumption so early, but “Retribution” has a story that’s very paper thin and used as a guideline for stunts and featuring Jovovich naked. What story there is makes no sense and is convoluted as hell. Assuming the audience cares, “Retribution” plays catch up for the audience in the first five minutes with a look back at the first four movies almost as if this is a some exciting epic we just have to catch up with. If you are watching the fifth part of a movie without having seen the first four, why are you wasting your time? And if you’ve seen the first four and are intent on watching this new entry, when did you decide good movies were no longer worth your time?
Our Top Ten Favorite "The Simpsons" Stars
Before the days of pandering for audiences with Britney Spears and Backstreet Boys, “The Simpsons” had a knack for casting humongous and iconic stars for their series to come on and play important roles. And then later on they’d lampoon them. There was Michael Jackson, and Jack Lemmon, and Jon Lovitz, as well as most of the Beatles. And while it never became the main lure for audiences, it was a treat to see who’d pop up in the next episode to play a role in the Simpsons’ lives. Here are ten of our favorite guest stars on “The Simpsons.”