The entire time I was observing the villains in Haneke’s remake of “Funny Games,” I could only ironically think back to the monologue Tim Roth gave in the opening of “Pulp Fiction.” His story about a man who robbed a bank over the phone by claiming he’d shoot a child, while the bank was never sure if there was ever actually a child was reminiscent of the two young men who could have posed a threat to the couple and their child here. There’s never an actual indication that they’re harmful in the beginning, nor is there an indication of their deadly capability until coerced with difficulty by their victims, there’s only the possibility, and sometimes that’s all people need to incite petrifying fear in a stranger.
Tag Archives: Suspense
April Fool's Day (2008)
It’s all a practical joke in the end. What? You’re mad that I ruined the twist? Too bad. Now let’s cut the crap here, I’m not going to pretend “April Fool’s Day” was a masterpiece of eighties horror cinema, because it wasn’t. It was boring, bland, and had a climax that was as predictable as it could get. It’s called “April Fool’s Day,” the surprise twist is given off the bat. So when news came that it was being remade, I had a general series of reactions. Anger that they’d be remaking another movie, disappointment that they couldn’t improve on the original, and sheer frustration that it had been geared to the “My Super Sweet 16” audiences now focusing on a group of rich kids. Now as much as I love to see Buffy and Muffy heiress get an axe in the head, this new set up is annoying because it’s pointless. “April Fool’s Day” is a blip on the remake radar and for good reason. It’s a low budget redo by terrible directors, and yes, we’re setting down on some rich folkels.
Diary of the Dead (2007)
Romero has given his fans something to take to the grave with them, with five films that are generally contradictory and controversial phenomena. There was “Night” and “Dawn” which are still basically debated and adored, the once despised, but now appreciated “Day” and the rather sub-par “Land,” all leading into “Diary.” Romero’s newest output is a confusing fascinating beast. Never has one of his films completely divided fans before, and admittedly it’s a monster worth observing. It’s both despicable and brilliant, it’s hideous and yet quite apt. “Diary” continues splitting fans that both despise it and adore it for the very same reasons. But is Romero really just the observer here?
Amateur Porn Star Killer 2 (2007)
Whether I liked the movie or not, I was very hesitant about the prospect of “Amateur Porn Star Killer 2,” because I think the first movie worked perfect on its own as a standalone event. We here at Cinema Crazed love the dudes at Alter Ego, but we do not hesitate to express disdain at curious film moves and call someone on their bullshit. “Amateur Porn Star Killer 2” has a great visual flair about itself and really seems to build up to something eventually explosive that I found difficult to turn away from. Remember, I was very cynical and almost unwilling to give this a chance for fear this would be just a rehash, but alas, I ended up really liking it in the end. “Amateur Porn Star Killer 2” meets our previous killer and voyeur Brandon who has now moved on to yet another victim in another city. What Ryan seems to strive for with both films is to get us infatuated with these women somehow getting us to sympathize for this killer when he finds he’s infatuated with them. Michiko Jimenez was a gorgeous and innocent young girl who was surprisingly sexy and in a sense Ryan seems to idealize the character setting her up for this fall which ends as a harsh blow to the audience.
30 Days of Night (2007) (DVD)
I guess it’s just a cardinal rule from now on, but regardless of who you are, some comic books just can’t be movies. Because while “30 Days of Night” is a very good vampire film, it just isn’t the best I’ve ever seen. I wasn’t tingling, I wasn’t beaming, and I simply wasn’t connecting to these fanged fucks from beginning to the end. Granted, “30 Days of Night” is a great chaotic vampire film that puts the bite back into these demonic beings, but watching it a second time grants a better sense of clarity, and it’s just not a masterpiece. Watching it again also made me appreciate what I may have ignored the first time. David Slade has a great grasp on the concept and narrative presented here giving his vampires an utter sense of terror. They’re mindless, but they’re also calculating and clever without being homoerotic and mopey theater patrons. “30 Days of Night” is a valiant success at completely rethinking the vampire concept, and it works for what it promises.
Wrestlemaniac (El Mascarado Massacre) (2006)
In a nutshell “Wrestlemaniac” hurts so good. It’s a stupid, moronic, and outright cheesy slasher flick and yet… I liked it. Believe it or not, “Wrestlemaniac” has every opportunity to fall on its face. It’s a little over an hour in length, it has this obnoxious yellow tint, and has some terrible acting, but the first ten minutes really do sell us on the intentions of it being nothing more than a tongue in cheek horror farce. I mean, when the primary monster is a psychotic luchador, you have to make the compromise and loosen your strings a bit, folks.
Vanished Acres (2006)
There isn’t much you can do with the fantasy genre anymore, especially with the short film format, but lo and behold, director Adam Bolt finds a way by making his fantasy characters much less cutesy padding, but much more incredible symbols of unrequited love, unspoken misery, and demons of the past that simply won’t stay dead. Bolt’s direction is morbid enough to where even the most light hearted moments are filled with dread and spooky plot elements that always keeps “Vanished Acres” on the border of horror.