Mac Ahlberg’s porn comedy begins on a literal high note with a wonderful little masturbation scene featuring the insanely beautiful Teresa Svensson as Eva asleep in the buff dreaming of a man while fingering herself near orgasm. Hilarity ensues when her upright do-gooder older sister intervenes and attempts to wake her up leading to some incestuous horse play that ends with a splash. Eva’s older sister declares that in order to keep her sister from getting in to trouble, she’s shipping her off to an all girls school. I mean, nothing could wrong there right?! The fool proof plan Eva’s sister has provided essentially unravels as Eva is shipped off to a sophisticated school for moral edification (I’m quoting one of the characters) where she will straighten up and fly right.
Category Archives: Grindhouse Review Fest
The She-Beast (1965)
I’m still trying to figure out if Michael Reeves’ 1966 quasi-creature feature is an unintentional satire, or just an overrated piece of cult cotton candy that gets more credit than it deserves. It was tough to make heads or tails of this movie at times, and you can sense the writer going off the rails in many instances where he just didn’t seem to be able to grasp his own premise. Why would it take bullets to bring down a witch that was around during the eighteenth century? Why bullets of all things? It’s tough to really capture what the film is going for when it purports to be an honest to goodness horror film and then shows a title card reading “Transylvania – Today.” Seriously? That’s the best that they could do?
Amateur Porn Star Killer 3: The Final Chapter (2009)
In what I can assume is the final film in the “Amateur Pornstar Killer” film series, Shane Ryan commits fully to the “Final Chapter” in which our villainous voyeur Brandon returns yet again to wreak havoc and pure sexual violence on a poor young girl. Rather than lure her in like the first film, or gain her trust as a friend in the second, he’s just taken her hostage. Seemingly out of options this time around, Brandon and his camera have kidnapped a horrified young woman and brings her to a deserted landscape where he proceeds to pretty much sexually abuse and rape the crying woman as she can do nothing but cry and endure his punishment. As far as Ryan’s film series has gone, this is his most disturbing film to date and I seriously had a difficult time sitting through this. As is the case with Ryan’s other films, there are some utterly pointless sequences here including the first ten minutes which cuts from Brandon’s torture of his first victim, while oddly cutting to establishing shots of a city and Halloween decorations.
Death Wish (1974)
Before “The Punisher” ever graced the big screen director Michael winner’s 1974 revenge flick brought to screen a psychotic man armed with a hand gun avenging his family who suffered a wicked fate by the hands of senseless crime. In a time where violence and rape was rampant in New York City, “Death Wish” is still a surprising little thriller that not only puts on display the grim and grimy depths of the Big Apple in the seventies, but the descent in to sheer lunacy one mild mannered man takes when his wife and daughter are attacked and raped in their apartment. The thugs get away but protagonist Paul Kersey’s wife dies and he’s forced to bear witness to his daughter lose her sanity due to the severity of the attack she and her mother endured.
Plague Town (2008)
Adding to the continued xenophobia themed horror sub-genre, “Plague Town” is a movie that acts as a form of torture on its movie viewing audience implementing some of the most absolutely irritating and obnoxious characters I’ve ever seen put to a horror film, ever. Director Gregory tries to bring us in at eye view on a family of travelers who are griping and bitching at one another with some issues that have yet to be resolved. But that attempt to add these warring characters to the fold of horrific freaks on the Irish countryside works against him as there isn’t a single sympathetic character in the lot.
Frat House Massacre (2008)
Admittedly I wasn’t the biggest fan of Alex Pucci’s “Camp Daze.” While it was an original concept for the camp slasher it was a bit too reliant on throwbacks to the slasher sub-genre to be the perfect horror film. Pucci bounces back though with “Frat House Massacre” an excellent horror slasher that sets down in the late seventies revolving around familiar themes of revenge, karma, and the inevitable twist. It’s surprising that with such a small budget Pucci is able to accomplish what Ti West did in “House of the Devil,” hearkening back to the decade of the seventies so adamantly and making this feel successfully like a capsule of the time with fashions, hairstyles, and a killer soundtrack and synth score that makes this seem utterly genuine.
Easter Bunny, Kill! Kill! (2006)
Though I thoroughly enjoyed director Chad Ferrin’s “Easter Bunny Kill! Kill!” I have to say that its primary downfall is that it takes much too long to build up to anything violent or horrific. A good forty minutes in to the movie I understood the build-up but could never understand why it took so long to extrapolate on the cruelty of the supporting characters. In spite of those flaws though “Easter Bunny Kill! Kill!” is a great little horror karma tale you’ll enjoy if you’re willing to invest enough time in the story and over the top performances.