Once upon a time, Kevin Smith decided that he liked “Scott Pilgrim vs. The World” so much that he’d copy the cliff notes and paste them on to a recycled fossil of his former glory in the shape of “Clerks” and build himself a brand spankin’ new cult classic. Instead what we get is a movie pandering to teens that is very obviously made by a fifty year old man if he were trying to write like Diablo Cody. I imagine Kevin Smith spent much of his time writing his screenplay for “Yoga Hosers” and promising to cast daughter Harley Quinn in it if she helped with the dialogue and much of the modern colloquialisms. Meanwhile he stuck to what he knew: which is stuff about convenience store clerks, and mocking Canada wholesale. There are shelves of maple syrup in the background, and boxes of cereal like “Cheeri-EHs.” Plus, our two main characters begin their work shift (almost in a subliminal apology to the audience) muttering in repetition “Sawrry Aboot That.”
Tag Archives: Dark Comedy
Hag (2014)
“Old Hag Syndrome” is a state of paralysis where the sleeper usually awakens completely frozen, but conscious and is convinced a supernatural entity is among them and is sitting on their chest. This is where the origin of creatures like the Succubus stems from. Scott Somers is a seemingly normal man married to a beautiful wife named Marie, but every night he awakens to see his wife standing at the window and muttering to herself. Convinced she’s sleepwalking, Scott awakens yet again in the middle of the night, but this time incapable of movement.
Black Christmas (2006)
Glenn Morgan’s remake of the Bob Clark 1974 slasher film is one of most preposterous, blatantly awful films I’ve seen in the last two years. As a remake and as its own film, it’s awful. Director-Writer Morgan seems to aim for the exact opposite effect the original established, and does so through often hilarious methods of murders, and vague characterization. All the characters are loud, one-dimensional, and despicable, none of the actors give stand out performances, there’s an awfully predictable plot twist involving our killer, gross out gore for the sake of gross out gore. Of course, Billy uses every element of Christmas as a method of murder for his victims.
Best Fake Friends (2016)
After moving to the Portland area for her husband’s work, Joy finds herself looking for new friends in the local mom crowd. Having found her way to a big party, she meets a few of the “cool” moms who will first support her and then test her limits. Written by Sarah Hehman and Christi Sperry and directed by Paul Kampf build an adult version of the teenage-clique film which works. The characters they build feel like grown-up versions of people most of us encountered in high school: the good girls that are slightly bookworm-y, the rich girls from silver-spoon backgrounds, the cool and dangerous girls, etc.
Tales of Halloween (2015) [Blu-Ray/2-DVD/CD]
Just in time for Halloween 2016 comes one of the best horror indie anthologies of the last six years. “Tales of Halloween” is a sick, demented, and fun ode to the thrill of Halloween and its mythology and brings together up and comers and veterans of the horror film world to spin their own twisted yarns concerning the holiday many horror buffs hold so dearly to them. Epic Pictures grants fans a wonderful box set edition that holds all sorts of goodies for them. The best prize of all is “Tales of Halloween,” a movie that pays tribute to everything fun and horrifying about the holiday with ten short tales starring folks like Lin Shaye, and Adrienne Barbeau who unofficially reprises her role of Stevie Wayne as the film’s Halloween DJ who narrates every story. The neat touch to the movie is that every story unfolds within the vicinity of a normal suburban neighborhood on Halloween night.
Director’s Cut (2016) [FrightFest 2016]
An unhinged fan buys his way onto a film set by way of crowd funding. Well into filming, he decides to kidnap lead actress Missi Pyle to force her to shoot his better version of the film which he has already started shooting without her knowledge. Writer Penn Jillette (yes, that Penn) and director Adam Rifkin create a cheesy cop film which is them overlaid and cut up with comments and scenes create by Jillette’s character Herbert Blount who fancies himself a better director than Rifkin due to all the learning he has done online.
Basket Case 2 (1990) [Blu-Ray]
Since the first “Basket Case” was screaming for a sequel (?), Frank Henenlotter graces us with a follow up to the first cult classic. This time around we follow up with the exploits of those wacky homicidal conjoined freaks known as Dave and Belial. Henenlotter is in on the joke, even recasting original star Kevin Van Hentenryck, who shockingly hasn’t aged since the first film. His acting skills haven’t improved, either, but that seems to be part of what makes these “Basket Case” movies so loony and deranged. In either case, after being torn apart, Duane begins to feel a little stir crazy, especially now that he and Belial have discovered a massive home filled with deformed and grotesque humans run by the eccentric Granny Ruth.