I’m a sucker for a good tale about superheroes and the learning of their abilities and so on. I admit that. I love a good superhero tale, and that’s why I didn’t completely dislike “Sky High,” because beneath its Disney muck, it’s actually a pretty fun tale about living up to your parents and the pressures of it. Michael Angarano is Will, the only son of a suburban couple who happen to be the world’s strongest superheroes. Ahem—they met during a battle and fell in love, and now are a team. “The Incredibles,” you say? Well, yes, but I just plain enjoyed Kurt Russell as a somewhat demented working class father who encourages his son to take up the family business. “Sky High” is busy, it’s colorful, and it will keep its target audience watching with a smile.
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Snakes on a Train (2006)
For their credit, this is one of their more competent pieces of crap, and that’s because there’s considerably good gore, and an interesting take on ripping off “Snakes on a Plane.” But, if there’s any more of example of the inconsistency behind Asylum’s newest rip-off it’s the two characters at the beginning whom are illegal immigrants and can’t understand nor speak English to a Texas man sneaking them across the border, yet when they get on a train and meet a friend, they begin understanding and speaking perfect English.
Snakes on a Plane (2006)
Samuel L. Jackson has just bought himself a heaping helpful of infamy and prestige shamelessly bragging about and spearheading one of the most ludicrous ad campaigns ever enlisted for such a ridiculous movie. I admit I was one of the many who thought the hype, jokes, spoofs, et al were all overblown for what could have been a mediocre big budget crap fest. But you know what? When all was said and done, I’d rather have a fun ridiculous original film, then another remake of a childhood classic. And that’s what invariably won me over on “Snakes on a Plane”.
Soul Searcher (2005)
I am the grim reaper, I walk softly, carry a big scythe, and kick demonic ass from here to Narnia. And now you know the concept of “Soul Searcher”. I enjoyed this flick from the very beginning where our hero is driving a truck overnight and accidentally interrupts the grim reaper kicking a demons ass all over the street. The grim reaper is falling ill and needs a new apprentice to help him in stopping the forces of evil from opening the realm of Hades and letting in a horde of uglies, and the guy named Joe happens to be the man he’s looking for–and he’s taking no prisoners.
Silent Hill (2006)
Christophe Gans’ depiction of the “Silent Hill” video game is really above dreck like “Doom” and “Resident Evil”. It’s a very popular series of games that are basically just a woman looking for her daughter in the ghost infested abandoned town, as she battles demons and tries to decrypt a mystery. Instead of adhering to the game and letting its formulas trap it down, it instead attempts to break out. It sticks true to the source material and also delves deep into focusing on an actual story and deep characterization in spite of its failings. Though there’s yet to be an actual video game adaptation that’s been fantastic, “Silent Hill” works because it dares to challenge its conventions of the video game world.
Suburban Sasquatch (2005)
I don’t care if you’re independent or big budget, all-star or aspiring actor, first time director or veteran director, comedy is hard, it’s very hard, and more often than not, chances are you’re just not going to ace a comedy film. “Suburban Sasquatch” misses the target in every conceivable manner, because it’s never coherent or fluid. It never follows a coherent storyline, and even the worst of horror comedies make sense. Not a lick of what’s here makes the slightest bit of sense. “Suburban Sasquatch” really has a lot going for it, but never delivers in what it promises. The dialogue is inaudible, the characters are boring, and the plot rarely ever holds together.
Supercross (2005)
If you needed any verification towards the quality of “Supercross” you need look no further than the first ten minutes. After our character narrates that he and his brother are close, and that just because they’re close doesn’t mean they never compete, and that their father dreamed of having them as Supercross stars, we’re subjected to a nearly ten minute long opening featuring a montage of motocross sequences set to a dramatic scores and flickering credits. Oh joy. And then there’s the actual film after the stunt show. We’re dragged along with pool cleaners whom rely on their jobs and have nothing else in their lives except their job, which they rely on, and their bikes.