Prison-A-Go-Go! (2003)

Posted on March 24, 2007 by Felix Vasquez

I have no aversion to women in prison movies. No, sir, I do not. I happen to enjoy good schlock when it’s done well, and I happen to enjoy flicks like “Cellblock Sisters.” When I caught wind of “Prison A-Go-Go!”, I was utterly intrigued. It’s not often you get a movie that’s intended to be schlock these days. Some directors just make bad movies and pretend its schlock, and many attempt schlock but fail miserably. “Prison A-Go-Go!” gets it right most of the time. “

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The Roost (2004)

Posted on December 31, 2006 by Felix Vasquez

What are bats? Flying rats who shit on you while flying off. What is “The Roost”? A flying piece of shit. Same difference, don’t you think? Actually, when I finished “The Roost,” I think watching seventy minutes of stock footage with bats would have been much more thrilling than Ti West’s horror indie. I can just imagine the brain storming for this junk with West trying to sell it:

Producer: So, what’s it about?
West: Four people on the road…
Producer: Oh god.
West: Discover an abandoned farm house.
Producer: Oh geez.
West: Will you let me finish?
Producer: Fine.
West: They discover an abandoned farm house, and are attacked by ravenous bats!
Producer: Okay…?
West: And they flutter, and tear your face apart! Gah!
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Undead (2005)

Posted on December 29, 2006 by Felix Vasquez

Small town, hapless folks, average day, and a comet. All of which are the menu for a brutally satirical zombie film known by horror fans as “Undead.” The low budget Aussie production has become renowned among horror fans as one of the better zombie films to come around in years, and they’d be right. Aside from the masterpiece “Shaun of the Dead,” The Spierig Brother’s film manages to be both creepy, and utterly twisted a concept hard to accomplish with zombie fare now an utterly tired genre. What occurs in “Undead” is the typical, yet unpredictable. A bunch of comets crash in a small town, and now all the residents have become brain eating zombies—don’t you hate when that happens? Now, the remaining survivors, a bunch of officers, a model, a pregnant nurse, and a bayou hunter, have to find their way out and figure out how to stop the epidemic.

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City of Rott (2006)

Posted on October 31, 2006 by Felix Vasquez

Don’t be fooled, its goofy animation isn’t a sign that it’s for kids. This is strictly an adult affair, folks. Imagine “South Park” played with a straight face, imagine Romero’s “Dead” films without a plot, and you’ll get Frank Sudol’s “City of Rott.” An old man is the basic hero for Sudol’s zombie epic in which a new toxin discovered in water creates a citywide epidemic of flesh eating zombies that are rotting from the inside out. Armed with only a walker, which is his best friend, his means of conveyance, and his weapon, he looks around for some new loafers to help his ailing feet, but he can’t stop running into those stupid zombies, and the parasites that leak from the bodies when destroyed.

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LovecraCked! The Movie (2006)

Posted on September 27, 2006 by Felix Vasquez

Elias goes for the good old trick of cinema. When all else fails, throw in a hot chick or two. And man, are there ever good looking women here. Gillian MacGregor is one who will burn herself into your brain in “Witch’s Spring” as a rather sexy witch seducing a man, and then there’s Nicky Ladanowski in “Bug boy” a fleeting and rather horrific little skit involving a man’s rage manifesting itself into a monster. Elias’ talent shows, and when he tackles the horror element, he really pulls through in a gritty disturbing manner. Take for the example the weird “RePenetrator” which is surprisingly funny and inappropriately erotic, in which the Dr. West re-animates a body so hot he has to engage in rough sex with it before it turns on him.

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Zombie Island (2005)

Posted on September 18, 2006 by Felix Vasquez

Director Bill Whirity’s “Zombie Island” is set in a reality, where a local town attracts tourists by inviting young hunting aficionados to a small little island off their coast. This particular tourist attraction happens to be an island filled with zombies. Three young guys looking for a good time beg to go on the island, and do so by a boater who hands them firearms and handheld weapons. At first, the tourist attraction seems more like a tourist trap, but as the zombies start popping up, the game no longer becomes fun.

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