There’s no reason to watch Tom Six’s movies. I’ll just say it. The man, as far as I can see, is a haughty self-satisfied tool who has no loyalty to his craft or his fans. And yes he has fans. Honestly! “Human Centipede” bred a legion of torture porn fans convinced Six was on to something with his “artistic” enterprise in to human suffering. In reality Six has admitted his idea of Human Centipede is far-fetched. He doesn’t even stand by his film, often mocking it with hushed snickers. And now we have “Human Centipede II,” a meta-movie that shows Six’s general disgust and discontent for his fans. Here, the movie he made is really a movie and the world we live in is a black and white cesspool. His one true fan is a bulbous, obese, perverse, man-child who does nothing but revel in human suffering because he’s trying to manifest the Human Centipede for himself.
Category Archives: Movie Reviews
Superman: Requiem (2011)
Speaking as a hardcore Superman geek, I’m especially happy to see more indie filmmakers come out of the wood work to put on display their storytelling chops for Superman. What with the newest Superman film arriving in theaters in 2013, it’s especially pleasing to see more of the Man of Steel in the fan film circuit. I mean why the hell should Batman get all of the good fan films, anyway? “Requiem” is an admittedly ambitious and intimidating undertaking. Much like “Superman Returns,” it owes much of its mood and tone to the classic Christopher Reeve pictures, and director Gene Fallaize pretty much acquires the same atmosphere and implements the classic score the original Reeve films once had.
Specimen (1996)
“Specimen” is one of those late nineties relics that has to be seen to be believed or else you’ll be sure it never existed. A TV movie and straight to video film, “Specimen” is by and large one of the many blemishes on its stars filmographies that acts as merely a vehicle and some work during their down time and serves as nothing more than filler. A rip off of “The Terminator 2,” “Firestarter,” and “Fire in the Sky,” Douglas Bradshaw’s film is one I discovered in the 1999 and have yet to get over. It’s a cheesy knock off and one that prides itself in being a shameless carbon copy, but I love it just the same at the end of the day.
Superheroes (2011)
Director Mike Barnett’s chronicling of real life superheroes wants to ultimately have it both ways. It’s at times very exploitative and mocks its subjects relentlessly with tricky editing and bloopers that depict the subjects as lunatics in costumes, and by the second half Barnett tries to depict his clan of costumed lunatics in to something of a do gooder bunch with well meaning intentions that will undoubtedly get them killed one day. You can do nothing but feel pity for these people who have taken to creating ridiculous costumes and using Power Rangers as their inspiration for patrolling streets and risking being murdered rather than take up admirable trades like EMT services, law, and so much more that they can contribute society.
Black Scorpion (1995)
Only in a Roger Corman inspired film can you see a super villain who is asthmatic and base their entire gimmick around being asthmatic. But that comes with the territory with this mid-nineties made for Showtime Television movie that I fondly recall re-watching over and over. If only for the brief nudity. But in reality I would have watched anything with superheroes and “Black Scorpion” was right up my alley as a blossoming movie buff showing love for the cult. This Batman-esque trashy crime thriller stars the sexy Joan Severance as Darcy Walker, a cop born and raised who has had enough of the law. Especially when her dad is mysteriously killed by a town politician in cold blood before her eyes.
Captain America: The First Avenger (2011)
Fourth time’s a charm for Marvel who have finally stopped trying to retrofit their banner first tier character Captain America and just outright accepted that for better or for worse their most iconic superhero is meant for his time period, a time during world war II where Cap Am could mostly come to use to bring down the Nazis and the evil Hydra. Who better to bring this retro character to the big screen than Joe Johnston, a man who successfully brought us “The Rocketeer” in the early nineties? Much of that same child-like enthusiasm and movie serial aura is carried over in to this new version of Captain America where Marvel finally gets it right.
I Am Number Four (2011)
Flawed and by no means a masterpiece, I sense “I Am Number Four” is a film that will become one of my favorites that I’ll be defending for years to come. I won’t sit here and claim this is a flawless piece of science fiction action cinema, but for what it promises in the beginning, it works wonders in delivering what’s essentially a teen oriented action film. “I Am Number Four” touches on my weak points in fiction concerning teens realizing their destinies and aliens from another world battling it out on mid-west suburbia confronting each other in a war that neither of us can fathom.