Across The Universe (2007) (DVD)

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One of the benefits of being a hardcore Beatles fan is that I don’t really need to buy the covers of the best Beatles songs of all time presented in “Across the Universe.” Instead I have the entire soundtrack and much more in my grasp. Ain’t it sweet? “Across the Universe” gets a lot of guff for being that representation of the Beatles that wasn’t mean to be. It’s a movie, a mainstream movie, with a rather cliché story, but you know what? Fuck it. “Across the Universe” is an absolute masterpiece, a thrilling, chilling, and incredible musical experience that takes the best of the Beatles and transfers it into an awfully excellent romance and war time story under the direction of Julie Taymor who takes a movie and makes it into a cathartic experience for the fans.

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Alvin and the Chipmunks (2007)

When I was a child, I absolutely loved the Chipmunks. And like every child born in the eighties, or born at the tail end of the eighties, I adored their covers of classic doo wop and Motown songs, with the squealed high pitch vocals, crude but effective animation and life lessons. And we all knew Alvin was the coolest. At the start of the sentence you’ll notice I said “When I was a Child” I loved the Chipmunks. Now, sitting here at twenty four years old, I long for the old series and find myself kicking my own ass at the fact that this eighties chic throwback entertained me.

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Marvel Zombies: The Movie Trailer (2007)

MZDirectors Scotty Fiels and Jim Ojala are asking for litigation for their fan film, and you know what? I’d gladly testify and plead for their mercy in the court room, because not only are these two wack jobs balls enough to approach an ambitious concept as Marvel Zombies, but they do it so damn well, it’s shocking. “Marvel Zombies” is a wonderful series in the Marvel Universe that involves an unknown germ that arrives in space via the superhero The Sentry, who turns into a zombie and infects every single superhero in the Marvel Universe in the process. So, obviously outmatched, humanity falls under the wave of super powered invincible flesh eating zombies who bring Earth to its knees eating everything in their sights.

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The Ninja Always Rings Once (2007)

the_ninja_always_rings_onceI really wanted to like this. I really wanted to like it to the point where I was almost forcing myself to enjoy it, but damn it, I just didn’t enjoy it as much as I could have or should have. Comedy is a tough thing to create and surely enough “The Ninja Always Rings Once” proves that rule with a short story that not only really made no sense, but never sparked a laugh from yours truly.

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Open Water 2: Adrift (2006)

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I don’t know what I thought of “Open Water 2” in the end. I mean everyone knows by now that it’s not technically a sequel, just another movie that was branded “Open Water 2” but it makes its connection to the first film pretty much incidentally. As “Adrift” this is a hellish and grueling thriller that’s reliant of course on paranoia, elemental danger, and being marooned in an area with no hope of rescue or miracles. I’m a huge fan of the original movie “Open Water,” which is one of the most underrated and excruciating experiences ripped from the headlines that translated well. “Adrift” is along the same themes involving a group of friends who go yachting and find themselves in the middle of the ocean stuck in the water after forgetting to pull down the ladder on the boat. As the hours wage on, character Amy’s newborn daughter is still aboard starving and suffering from the heat, and now the folks have to find a way to get on the boat before she dies.

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Live Free or Die Hard: Unrated Version (2007)

So, I opted on the DVD to watch the Unrated version, which sported a few F bombs and a little more edge. I’m sure the Rated and Unrated version probably didn’t sport many differences, but I owed it to myself to give the Unrated version the top priority. I won’t babble about Die Hard, or why the PG-13 rating is stupid, instead I’ll talk about Mary Elizabeth Winstead. This girl is absolutely gorgeous and sure, she may not be Meryl Streep, but she’s definitely one of the finer girls in film today and I dig her role her as John McClane’s daughter Lucy who is, like her dad, rebellious, smart mouthed, and always seems to stare evil down the throat with a smirk.

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Epic Movie (2007)

It’s sad that the days when a spoof showed potential of pure brilliance or cult standing are long gone and now usher in nothing but incredibly awful or mediocre movies that assume spoofing is done best when satirizing the scenes and not the ideas. “Epic Movie” is the next step in the evolution of this sub-genre where you can see the writers getting collectively lazier with each title as the years pass.

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