If you go into “A Nutcracker Tale” expecting full blown Tom and Jerry mayhem involving burning hands, cut tails, and knives to the butt, then you’re going to be disappointed. We’re now at a time of sheer confusion where a cat cutting a mouse’s tail is crossing the line yet we’ll willingly allow our children to watch MTV. Censors and the FCC can never seem to make up their damn minds, anymore.
Category Archives: Movie Reviews
Resident Evil: Extinction (2007)
I’ve come to grips with the fact that we may never be able to have an almost accurate and horrifying zombie film stemming from “Resident Evil,” but perhaps someday someone will reboot the franchise and actually create some great zombie flicks. In case you didn’t know it, “Extinction” recaps the entire three films, including the story of Umbrella ad nauseum, and yes, there’s nothing like a warmed over sense of tension and suspense. From the first five minutes, it’s pretty obvious this has no idea what it wants to be, but truly, it’s just another episode in an ongoing franchise, regardless of the pretense it sets up that it’s the final film in the series. It’s not.
The Snow Queen (2007) (DVD)
One of the appealing aspects of “The Snow Queen” that instantly won me over the unorthodox atmosphere present within this fantasy world. Director Julian Gibbs never quite opts to provide a set and strive for a period piece, instead he makes a noticeably unrealistic set piece and alters it enough to make the world of “The Snow Queen” from the impoverished village to the winter wonderland look like a moving painting as done from a surrealist of a sort. The pastels and shades to “The Snow Queen” are so utterly appealing to watch, and while I could notice the CGI, I absolutely loved what Gibbs was going for with this.
I Am Legend (2007)
Let me just put this on you right now. I have never read “I Am Legend,” I love the previous incarnations, I’m not a fan of Richard Matheson because I’ve never read his work, I had no bias’ going into this movie, and I looked forward to this loose adaptation of Matheson’s beloved novel. Is that all a plus or a negative? I’m not sure, really. The first hour of “I Am Legend” is fantastic, and I say this as someone who was comfortably middle ground when it came to the film and expectations.
Hatchet: Unrated Director's Cut (2006) (DVD)
Upon a second glance, “Hatchet” really doesn’t play too well. It’s a bit shrill, it’s pretty average slasher fare, and like it or not, the incredibly ridiculous hype really did hurt what was a pretty fun slasher film in spite of it all. David Green has a knack for direction and makes “Hatchet” an utterly hilarious slasher flick that’s helped by the above par production qualities and great performances. Deon Richmond almost steals the show with Parry Shen, and Mercedes McNab continues her dumb blond shtick with surprising competence. The gore effects are simply astounding and I really enjoyed the gruesome splatter and overall creative methods of dispensing of the poor saps that come across the deformed hacker that is Victor Crowley.
Shoot 'Em Up (2007) (DVD)
A man sits on a bench drinking coffee and eating a carrot, a pregnant screaming woman runs by. As does a man wielding a gun prepared to shoot her. Mr. Smith is now involved. Thus begins a sudden mission to protect a newly born child from a massive conglomerate and a surprisingly interesting reason why this child is wanted. I theorized all throughout Davis’s raucous action comedy and really wasn’t prepared to find a devious plot as complicated and absurd as the one explored here. “Shoot ‘Em Up is yet another variation on “Lone Wolf and Cub” with a mysterious warrior leaving a body count in the triple digits to protect a child, and though Davis derives from the concept, “Shoot ‘Em Up” is its own twisted animal. There’s really no point in hating “Shoot ‘Em Up”; it’s a ridiculous, idiotic and fantastical cartoon mixed with a formula video game, and it makes no presumption to pretend otherwise.
No Country for Old Men (2007)
I won’t lie when I tell you that it was a shame to see the Coen Brothers in such a slump. They gave us in no specific order “The Ladykillers,” a now infamous remake of a much better film, and then “Intolerable Cruelty” a week and dull dark comedy that was too glam for the duo. I’m glad to report that “No Country for Old Men” is just where they belong. It’s grit, edge, dark humor, and sheer menace in one package of incredible performances and results in a hybrid that’s basically my favorite film of 2007 and soon may just become one of my favorites of all time. Of course, this is not new for the Coens as “The Big Lebowski,” and “Fargo” currently rank in my top list.
