Sinister Squad (2016)

Posted on July 8, 2016 by Felix Vasquez

Once again The Asylum tip toes all the way to the finish line to avoid copyright infringement, offering up their own third hand version of “Suicide Squad.” Relying heavily on public domain characters and concepts, “Sinister Squad” isn’t your usual terrible Asylum fare. It’s more lackluster and tedious with a lot of the cast seemingly pushed in to mirroring the personalities they saw in trailers for “Suicide Squad.”

So star Johnny Rey Diaz is so not the Joker as a green haired maniac with odd teeth named Rumplestiltskin, while Talia A. Davis is so not Harley Quinn, as the mad red queen who is hopelessly in love with Rumplestiltskin. These stock fairy tale villains are assembled by Alice (a very fetching Christina Licciardi) who is left with no choice to call upon these baddies when their own Carabosse, who is so not Enchantress, breaks out to enact her own evil scheme. She plans to unleash the evil Death (can’t copyright Death), who with his cult, wants to either dominate the world, or garner a final form on Earth to rule over the realm.

It’s never clear what Death intends to do with Carabosse working with him, nor is there a whole lot of explanation as to where a piece of Alice’s looking glass factors in. Either way, like most Asylum productions, “Sinister Squad” is set in one place, primarily Asylum’s studios, where the entirety of the movie unfolds. Every action scene, dramatic confrontation, fight sequence, shoot out, and magic battle ensues within the corridors of the warehouses owned by Asylum, adding to the bargain basement aesthetic the film tries to side step so eagerly.

Aside from Licciardi, the only cast member who really rises above the tedium is Nick Principe who has a good time adding some variety to such a broadly sketched character, and tries to turn the generally boring villain in to a memorable nemesis. “Sinister Squad” is yet another knock off from The Asylum hoping to make some quick cash from easily confused foreigners, and relatives looking for a cheap present on the way to a third cousin’s birthday party. Only the morbidly curious need apply.

Now available on VOD.

Batman v Superman: Extended Cut or Why You Can’t Pour Perfume on a Pig

Posted on July 4, 2016 by Felix Vasquez

Pearls. Again. Bruce Wayne’s origin. Again. Joe Chill. I’m presuming. Again. I can still hear the echoes of fan boys rejoicing that “Batman v Superman” wouldn’t be another origin story, and yet director Zack Snyder allows us the thirtieth origin of Bruce Wayne, all for the purpose of squeezing in Bruce muttering “Martha.” Which is his mother. And so a thousand memes were born.

Director Zack Snyder doesn’t allow us the benefit of young Superman or Clark Kent with his mother, also curiously named Martha, because that would make sense. Plus, Snyder never worked with Diane Lane or Kevin Costner. It would be funny though to see Jeffrey Dean Morgan and Lauren Cohan playing John and Martha Kent.

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Carnage Park (2016)

Posted on July 1, 2016 by Emilie Black

Two bank robbers take a hostage in rural California after their botched robbery attempt. They take her on the road where they run afoul of an armed man who likes to go hunting for a special kind of game. “Carnage Park” is written and directed by Mickey Keating, who also did the very good “Pod,” as well as “Ultra Violence,” “Ritual,” and “Darling” which have all been on this reviewer’s radar, alas victims to the classic situation of too many movies, too little time. Keating knows his craft and how to build an effective film. This one being well written and directed, however for all its violence, it is not as effective as it should be.

The movie starts with a bang and maintains its violence and tension for a while, however, once the character of Vivian finds herself on the mad man’s property, the whole thing becomes routine cat and mouse and fizzles out which is unfortunate as her character, up to that point, was built as someone the viewers can care about. The story here, once it finds its groove doesn’t go off course which means there are no real twists and turns to it and it becomes unfortunately predictable. The characters created by Keating are interesting but not given much of an arc or evolution except for Vivian who gets a more to work with. These characters are brought to life by a competent cast, including the very charming (and adorable) Ashley Bell as Vivian.

Bell has some experience, however this is the first performance seen by this reviewer that brought her to the front and added her to a pack of newer actresses to be watched. As almost the entire movie rests on her performance, she did very well with only a couple of lesser moments. Playing opposite her are James Landry Hebert as Scorpion Joe, one of the bank robbers who take her hostage, and Pat Healy as Wyatt Moss, the gun happy mad man who’s made her his game for the day. Both turn in good performances, Hebert gives off a crazed desperation type of vibe, while Moss gives off a more calculated, calm performance. In a small cameo, viewers should recognize Ferris Bueller’s best friend, actor Alan Ruck, stealing a few scenes.

The setting here is its own character. In the sun-bleached desert of California in what looks like the 1970s, everything is perfect for the time period. From the décor, to the buildings, to the cars, to the clothes, et al., the production design by Angel Herrera and the art direction by Priscilla Watson are on point. Their work is highlighted by cinematographer Mac Fisker, a regular of Keating’s films, which shows the locations as perfectly deserted with well selected framing and focus on details most would not notice. Also worth noting is the music by Giona Ostinelli which works with the scenes and adds mood to the sometimes over-exposed images. The piece at the end of the film is very reminiscent of films like “The Texas Chain Saw Massacre,” perhaps even a bit too much as the film is already packed with homages to other films and art pieces.

“Carnage Park” is a violent, grimy piece of cinema with good performances. The story, based on a real crime, starts off very interesting but unfortunately becomes routine once the lead character starts being chased by the big baddie. The violence is well done and brutal, making the film an experience in itself; however it’s not enough to be fully engrossing. The first part of the film moves at a good pace, but it eventually starts to feel slow with a dew overly long sequences in complete darkness which are hard to follow and consequently hard to care about. The film seems to want to be a western, a horror film, a drama, etc but can’t seem to settle on a main focus.

For all its violence, Carnage Park brings a question: Can a film be both brutal and boring at the same time?

As with IFC’s other recent release, “Intruder,” “Carnage Park” has a mid-credit scene which feels out of place for this style of film.

On VOD and in select theaters on July 1^st, 2016; it is slated for a limited run at San Diego’s Digital Gym Cinema starting on July 8^th, 2016.

The Swinging Cheerleaders (1974): 2-Disc Special Edition [Blu-ray/DVD]

Posted on July 1, 2016 by Felix Vasquez

With how light hearted and sexual “The Cheerleaders” movie series is, I’m surprised how dramatic Jack Hill’s sequel “The Swinging Cheerleaders” is. It has its sexually charged moments, but it’s very much a sterner dramedy about a group of beautiful cheerleaders walking in to trouble. As a means of writing an article for a University paper, young Kate joins the local cheerleading squad in hopes of finding some sort of scandal for publishing. When the local coach and school dean becomes involved with gamblers and gangsters to rig football games, events go from bad to worse when Kate decides to alert the squad.

Meanwhile the other cheerleaders on the squad are dealing with their own problems and personal turmoil. There’s the beautiful Andrea, who is tricked in to becoming a part of a gang bang after refusing to sleep with her boyfriend to keep her virginity, and young Lisa who learns the hard way that the man she’s dating is involved with another woman. From there the movie jumps back and forth through various sub-plots and culminates in to the ultimate central plot where the football team and cheerleaders learn about the illegal gambling and decide to take matters in to their own hands.

“The Swinging Cheerleaders” is more of a drama than a comedy, but has a slew of really entertaining and fun moments, including when one of the football players decides to avenge young Kate, and the climactic battle between football players and crooked cops that ensue in a warehouse. The legendary Jack Hill’s direction is very much evident in the film, displaying his unique sense of pacing, his great use of the limited budget, and his keen understanding of the youth of the period and its penchant for rebellion. “The Swinging Cheerleaders” is a tonal shift in the series, but a damn fine drama comedy with a great sense of humor.

Featured from Arrow Video is a brand new restoration, offering up a crisp new version of the film. The new release comes in both DVD and Blu-Ray presentations, along with a reversible sleeve, and a neat collector’s booklet which include liner notes, vintage articles about the film, and full color stills with all of the cheerleaders present.

Among the extras, there’s a great nineteen minute Q&A with director Jack Hill, and actors Colleen Camp and the beautiful Rosanne Katon (my favorite of the cheerleaders!) recorded at the New Beverly Cinema in 2007. There’s an audio commentary with writer-director Jack Hill which was recorded specifically for the Arrow Video release, and a brand new interview with director Jack Hill. Finally, there are two archive interviews with cinematographer Alfred Taylor, and another archive interview with Jack Hill and Johnny Legend. Finally, there a small series of TV spots for the film.

Adventures in Babysitting (1987)

Posted on June 23, 2016 by Felix Vasquez

If there’s anyone who can play a dreamy babysitter seemingly pulled out of a fantasy, it’s Elisabeth Shue. She has the girl next door appeal with the extraordinary beauty that makes her such an interesting heroine in Chris Columbus’ small classic adventure. The 1987 comedy is about as unique as it gets, spawning a bunch of imitators, none of whom can really live up to the enthusiasm and comic timing that Shue, Keith Coogan, and Maia Brewton manage to in a little under eighty minutes time.

Shue plays dreamy eyed Chris Parker, a high school senior in a relationship she doesn’t realize is going South. When she’s let down by her long time boyfriend, she is tasked with babysitting the children of her parents’ friends. Both kids bring their own obstacles to the table for Chris, but her mundane night goes awry when Chris’ best friend Megan is stuck in a bus station, and needs to be picked up. What begins as a simple errand run, transforms in to an all night series of misadventures, prompting Chris to muster up courage, strength, and patience, all the while enduring her young charges.

Along the way, Columbus and writer David Simkins keep “Adventures in Babysitting” brisk and entertaining, offering up a lot of extraordinary scenarios our characters have to seemingly battle out of. Things seem to only get worse for Chris and her group as they also become the target of a ring of car thieves after they accidentally steal a “Playboy” filled with their top secret notes. Simkins writing is raucously fun, always skirting the line between an R rating and a G rating.

The more humorous dangerous encounters are almost always skirting the rating, right down to a gang war that involves a stabbing and Chris having to literally make a stand if she hopes to get everyone off of the train without being killed. Though there is a healthy dose of menace injected, “Adventures in Babysitting” is classic eighties fodder that’s just all out raucous fun for a broad audience. Columbus is never afraid to go off the wall and as a result delivers one very unique and entertaining comedy that has yet to be duplicated.

Steel (1997)

Posted on June 21, 2016 by Felix Vasquez

If you ever sat down and wondered “Why did it take so long for an Iron Man movie to hit theaters?” then you’d be wise to sit down and watch “Steel.” Not only did studios not invest in loyal adaptations of superheroes in the nineties, but the concept of a man in a metal suit fighting crime was impossible to put on screen. Especially if you have a studio unwilling to invest in committing to the concept and making it feel somewhat realistic with CGI. Steel was originally birthed as a Superman clone with a concept very similar to Iron Man. John Henry Irons was a weapons developer betrayed by his organization.

When Superman died, he took his weapons of mass destruction and used them to build a steel suit to help keep law and order in Metropolis. When Superman came back from the dead to take back his mantle, Steel became his own superhero with dignity and some sense of stature, but was always something of a fourth rate Iron Man clone. Obviously Warner took the concept and premise for this somewhat notable superhero and turned it in to a clunky and campy superhero adventure with zero stakes. Suddenly everything Jon Bogdanove, and Louise Simonson worked toward in making “Steel” somewhat of a hero in his own right was undone by this ridiculous movie. Here, there are only three vague references to Superman, while Shaquille plays an unconvincing military officer who is also developing weapons for combat. Judd

Nelson plays villain Nathaniel Burke whose lust for violence destroys their experiment causing John Henry Irons to be discharged from the military while Annabeth Gish as friend Sparky, is rendered a paraplegic. When John returns home, he learns his weapons are being streamlined for gang combat, and Nathaniel is behind it, making a deal with an arcade game exec to distribute and sell his high tech weapons. And he’s really evil, because they’re recruiting teenagers to test their weapons, booga, booga! “Steel” is a marvel of superhero cinema, mainly because it’s so painful watching Shaquille O’Neal stomping around in a heavy steel suit that looks so ill fitted to his form it gets gradually more embarrassing as the film unfolds. Why even bothering to adapt Steel is mind boggling, but adapting him in to this kids film makes the investment so much more horrendous.

The initial revelation of Shaq’s character John as Steel is supposed to be awe inspiring and cool, but Shaq looks so goofy in costume. It’s bad enough the suit looks heavy and clunky, Shaq can barely run around in it, but the helmet he wears makes him look awfully cross eyed. I’m willing to suspend my disbelief at a man running around in a clunky metal costume, but the police in the movie are so inept, they can barely keep up with the man moving as slow as molasses. Plus, it wouldn’t be too hard to find Steel’s alter ego. Just look for the only man in the city who is seven feet tall. From there, “Steel” is reliant on a heavy formula of repetition and camp that’s more obnoxious than cute.

To make the cruel experience more endurable here’s a good drinking game for you: Take two shots every time Shaq makes a basketball reference. Take a shot every time Shaq mumbles through a line. Take a shot every time Shaq rips something apart or breaks someone’s property. Take two shots every time Judd Nelson flares his nostrils. Your liver will be shot by the time the movie comes to a merciful close. Thankfully, “Steel” didn’t complete destroy the comic book movie, as it took “Blade” only a year later to prove comic book movies could be a bankable property worthy of an audience and franchise. The media usually credits “X-Men” but really, it started with “Blade.”

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows (2016)

Posted on June 14, 2016 by Felix Vasquez

While 2014’s “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles” was a watered down remake of the 1990 Jim Henson production, “Out of the Shadows” is a larger and sillier remake of “Secret of the Ooze” taking a lot of the ideas from the aforementioned film and realizing them to a more “TMNT” accurate vision. “Secret of the Ooze” had all the implications of the Krang, Baxter Stockman and the like, but “Out of the Shadows” takes that and re-introduces it to make about as much sense as it can. Rather than Tokka and Rahzar, we finally have Bebop and Rocksteady in their full disgusting glory, battling the Ninja Turtles, and playing stooges to the Shredder. “Out of the Shadows” isn’t a masterpiece by any means, but it’s ten times better than its 2014 predecessor.

That might be because it comes up with a radical new idea and focuses the majority of the sequel on the titular Ninja Turtles. April O’Neil is still a major character but is pushed to the sidelines more and more, allowing the characters we came to see a bigger spotlight and more of a chance to grow and blossom. The Platinum Dumbs version of the turtles is still wildly imperfect and stupid, but “Out of the Shadows” is at least fun, and tries to give us as many elements from the canon as possible. After Shredder’s plans from the first film are thwarted, he’s taken to jail and sent to a maximum security prison, supervised by Officer Casey Jones. When Shredder is broken free by his foot clan, he brings along thugs Bebop and Rocksteady to set off a plan to take over the world alongside a new alien ally.

Armed with mad scientist Baxter Stockman, Shredder plans to build a mutant army, and use his alien allies to help him rule. When the Turtles, with the help of April, learn of the mutagen, they learn the ooze has potential to turn them in to humans. With the turtles still pariahs of the city, Raphael is tempted to become human, while Leonardo tries to convince them to stay true to themselves. This time around there’s a larger focus on the dynamics of the brothers, as Leo and Raph bicker and fight for command over this current development, while Michelangelo is no longer making erection jokes, and is now the party dude we know and love, making cracks, fawning over pizza, and approaching every challenge with a chuckle worthy of Spiccoli. Stephen Amell is also a fun addition to the cast, providing a charismatic take on Casey Jones.

“Out of the Shadows” is a really good time and about as close to great as can be expected from something starring Megan Fox. I wish she’d drop out and allow an actress with actual ability and chemistry with her co-stars to take the reins as April. “Out of the Shadows” also has no idea how to handle so many elements of the narrative as there’s so much going on for a hundred minute movie. A lot of conflicts are tacked on, sub-plots go nowhere, and Splinter being retconned to have no connection to Shredder makes him a virtually pointless addition to the team. He literally does nothing but meditates in the background and offer convenient pearls of wisdom to his sons, with no actual emotional investment in their battle. You could have cut Splinter out of this movie, and it would have had no effect on the overall production.

Meanwhile there is the gaping wide hole of the new mutagen presented from Dimension X and the Krang. If the mutagen turns Bebop and Rocksteady from humans to animals, why can the mutagen possibly turn the turtles in to humans? They weren’t humans before they became teenage turtles. The implication of being mutants is that they’re anthropomorphic and human like, so wouldn’t they revert back to normal everyday turtles if given the mutagen? Also, I’m not a science wiz, but since when do the turtles have human DNA in them? Wouldn’t becoming human being a mutation be very redundant to the narrative? That said, if you can forgive the canyon wide plot hole, “Out of the Shadows” is an entertaining diversion that improves on a lot of the glaring flaws from the 2014 reboot.