The first mistake “Retribution” makes is that it assumes people actually care about the story. Not to make an assumption so early, but “Retribution” has a story that’s very paper thin and used as a guideline for stunts and featuring Jovovich naked. What story there is makes no sense and is convoluted as hell. Assuming the audience cares, “Retribution” plays catch up for the audience in the first five minutes with a look back at the first four movies almost as if this is a some exciting epic we just have to catch up with. If you are watching the fifth part of a movie without having seen the first four, why are you wasting your time? And if you’ve seen the first four and are intent on watching this new entry, when did you decide good movies were no longer worth your time?
Tag Archives: R
Robo Formers: Star of Fear (VHS)
Back in the nineties, I spent many a day trying to build up my own movie collection, and for poor folk, that’s tough. Imagine my surprise when after receiving my allowance I retreated to the local dollar store and saw some VHS movies for me to purchase with my own money. Granted, they weren’t blockbuster films, but they were public domain cartoons, and some pretty interesting gems that only bargain hunters discovered.
Rise of the Guardians (2012)
Such a simple premise should have delivered a bland and somewhat forgettable animated film, but what Dreamworks manages to pull together is not only impressive, but surely one of the best films of 2012. “Rise of the Guardians” is a testament to the magic of folklore and the strength of belief. Though it’s not an outright declaration of theism, “Rise of the Guardians” places a lot of power on the strength of belief on sentient beings and what they can do for those that place importance in them. “Rise of the Guardians” is a film that all audiences will truly enjoy that manages to unite some of the most iconic magical beings to form the ultimate super team.
Red Cloud: Deliverance (2012)
Sioux Cloud and Hezues R’s short “Red Cloud” is a film very much in the vein of “The Professional” and “Gone Baby Gone,” a short dramatic thriller that has potential to be a wider more full length story, in the end. “Red Cloud: Deliverance” is a very powerful and engrossing exploration of a man escaping his past and his demons, and in the process is confronted by a young girl facing her own demons on a daily basis.
Reel Evil (2012)
I’m yelling! I’m yelling very loudly and at the same time as everyone else thus creating the facade that there is conflict in a boring movie! I am angry for some reason! I am lost in a labyrinth of an abandoned insane asylum and am yelling louder for some reason! Watch me yell some more proving there is conflict where there is none! Loud noises! My temper is inexplicably short! It is very scary when people are lost in dark halls for almost eighty minutes only to hear the occasional whisper and no pay off!
The Return of the Living Dead (1985)
Director Dan O’Bannon’s 1985 zombie picture is about as pitch perfect a horror comedy you can get. The film itself re-imagines the walking dead and manages to deliver oodles of comedy and horror nuggets to its audience that has kept it alive and kicking since its initial release. What many thought was once an untouchable formula transformed the walking dead in to a beast anyone could tinker with, and allowed other writers and directors a chance at re-creating the modern zombie. Sadly, none have been quite as successful as Dan O’Bannon and the minds of “The Return of the Living Dead.”
Rocco (2011)
I’m assuming “Rocco” is open to interpretation for audiences everywhere as it’s a particularly twisted and demented short film about an imaginary friend and a man that may or may not be psychotic. Much of the film is incredibly muddled and not very explanatory, so I’m essentially left to figure out for myself what, if anything, the plot is alluding toward. After a series of deaths involving his old friends from his home town, a man is greeted with a box at his door. Of course logic tells us that he should open it to see what’s in it, and he does.