Someone somewhere figured that we as movie lovers and action buffs needed or would have wanted a “Tekken” movie–even if no one asked for it. Because as we are all aware, the “Mortal Kombat,” “Double Dragon,” and “Street Fighter” movies were all so amazing and rich in bone crunching action and sharp cinematic prowess that we just had to have a fifth tier video game franchise with fairly forgettable characters lacking any iconic sensibilities be turned in to action heroes for a potential film franchise. And not surprisingly this isn’t making the rounds in theaters any time soon. Movie websites have reported on this film for a short time and since then the word’s been slim to none on its quality.
Tag Archives: Romance
Black Dynamite (2009)
Pointless exposition, redundant dialogue, hammy acting, racial paranoia, cartoonish action scenes, continuity problems, absurd sub-plots that go absolutely nowhere, if you’ve ever seen blaxploitation films before, you’ll realize that Scott Sanders “Black Dynamite” is a pretty brilliant satire of the grindhouse sub-genre that managed to influence dozens of filmmakers and actors across the board. While the Wayans brothers paid tribute to the genre in “I’m Gonna Git You Sucka,” director Scott Sanders manages to rise above their level providing a both a spoof, satire, and loving tribute to the sub-genre that takes every single device from the sub-genre that we love and hate and throws it in to a story that’s about as ridiculous as most of the blaxploitation films from the seventies. As most comedy should be, Sanders and Jai White don’t play this spoof with a wacky atmosphere.
Clash of the Titans (2010): Combo Pack Blu-Ray/DVD/Digital
It should have been a no-brainer. A Greek myth about a hero being called upon to battle the gods while also fighting with various creatures is a concept begging to be made in to an amazing movie. “Clash of the Titans” is the Harryhausen movie that fans continue to love but also secretly wanted to see remade… only for a curiosity. We wanted to know what it would look like, but we didn’t want it to happen. And then we were given the bright idea by Warner to not only remake the Harryhausen opus but turn it in to a franchise.
Paris by Night of the Living Dead (2009)
I’m honestly still not sure what to even make of this short zombie film even hours after seeing it. It’s ridiculous, ultimately pointless, and just loud, but… it’s also creepy, brilliantly directed, and the zombie effects are some of the best I’ve seen in a while. “Paris by Night of the Living Dead” is a pretty straight forward zombie short film that doesn’t pretend it’s anything other than an excuse to show zombies being massacred, mutilated and blown up in about as much excessive ways as humanly possible. It’s just fast paced and insanely absurd, but I couldn’t stop watching it.
Red Skelton Whistling Collection (Whistling in the Dark / Whistling in Dixie / Whistling in Brooklyn) (1941) (DVD)
The Warner Archives have brought movie buffs of all kinds together to bear witness to the immortal Red Skelton and his “Whistling” trilogy, the 1941 comedy series that brought Skelton together with co-stars like Eve Arden and Virginia Grey. Restored and featured in three separate discs, the “Whistling” collection is ultimately a mixed bag of Skelton comedies that are all fairly flawed with some dated zingers that fall flat on numerous occasions, but when they shine, they manage to draw some genuine laughs thanks to Skelton who is sometimes too goofy to enjoy, and other times seem too funny for the material he’s handed.
Second Coming of Eva (Porr i skandalskolan) (1974)
Mac Ahlberg’s porn comedy begins on a literal high note with a wonderful little masturbation scene featuring the insanely beautiful Teresa Svensson as Eva asleep in the buff dreaming of a man while fingering herself near orgasm. Hilarity ensues when her upright do-gooder older sister intervenes and attempts to wake her up leading to some incestuous horse play that ends with a splash. Eva’s older sister declares that in order to keep her sister from getting in to trouble, she’s shipping her off to an all girls school. I mean, nothing could wrong there right?! The fool proof plan Eva’s sister has provided essentially unravels as Eva is shipped off to a sophisticated school for moral edification (I’m quoting one of the characters) where she will straighten up and fly right.
Galaxy Quest (1999)
In the late nineties, Tim Allen was pretty much at the top of his comedy game. The man was ending a long run on one of the most beloved family sitcoms of the nineties, he was known as the iconic Buzz Lightyear thanks to starring in one of the most revolutionary Disney films of all time, and he was appearing in anything he could get his hands on. One of the more adult related titles he starred in managed to be one of his highest grossing yet low key film to date that signaled an inevitable slump in his film career. But in spite of that descent in to becoming a third rate comedy star bouncing crotch shots off of a bloated brother of a comedy legend, “Galaxy Quest” is one of Allen’s most entertaining films, and continues to be a favorite of mine years subsequent its release in theaters. “Galaxy Quest” is a fantastic science fiction comedy, sure, but many years since its release, it’s managed to be a rotating title on my short list of absolute favorite films.