So you can’t call her babe. That’s where she draws the line. She responds violently to those who call her babe. But… what about boobs? Jugs? Mammary Madam? Chesty? How about Baby? It’s kind of like Babe, but not really. It’s a shame because the original comic book from Dark Horse called “Barb Wire” sounds like it could be a fun action film. A busty blond heroine addicted to adrenaline who fights crime from the heart of her night club could be a great film overall. Instead, the producers cast a popular model turned actress in the guise of Pamela Anderson, spend most of the film focusing on her enhanced bust to compensate for her sheer lack of acting ability, and basically just remake “Casablanca” and call it a day.
Tag Archives: Science Fiction
Street Sharks – The Complete Series (DVD)
It just goes to show that just because something is cool on paper, it doesn’t mean it’ll be scooped up by children. By 1994, pretty much every studio were looking for their own “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles” take off that could grant them instant success. Since the eighties and most of the nineties belonged ot the heroes in a halfshell, most of the animated studios looked for their own spin on the formula. There were at least dozen clones of the Ninja Turtles once the Ninja Turtles took off. One of them was “Street Sharks.”
Godzilla (1998)
You have to hand it to Roland Emmerich, his marketing for 1998’s “Godzilla” was fantastic. Before “Cloverfield” enforced not showing the monster until you had your butt planted in seats in theaters, Emmerich and Tristar applied the same marketing with just as much mystery. I fondly recall many of the early trailers for “Godzilla” being packed with questions about what the beast looked like rebooted. Hell, in 1997, I bought the movie book that explored the making of “Godzilla,” and there wasn’t a single picture in the book that gave a clear picture of the new Godzilla.
Overtime (2011)
I dare you to hate this movie. Directors Brian Cunningham and Matt Niehoff create such an entertaining and raucous amalgam of movie genres, that “Overtime” ends up being a very easy and memorable ninety minutes. Often times when directors attempt comedy, they fail big time, but “Overtime” manages to be one of those movies where everything goes wrong, and I laughed through most of the mishaps. Raph and Max are two gangsters that are trying to live their lives by some form of morality, and are trying to see what it’s like to go about their everyday lives without beating or killing someone.
Spiders (2013)
You know how I know “Spiders” is set in New York and not in a cleverly shot in a studio with the same set pieces re-used over and over again? Becawse Patrick Muldoon tawks like dis tru most of da movie. Youse guys and yaw clichés about New Yawkers! Hey, I’m walkin here! It sounds like I made a bad funny, but a character actually shouts that a half hour in to the movie. Because it’s not Canada if you don’t say “eh,” and it’s not New York if you don’t pay homage to Ratzo Rizzo.
The Terminator (1984)
When James Cameron came aboard the “Alien” series, he essentially took what was a dark science fiction horror film and transformed its sequel in to a action packed monster movie. When it came to Cameron’s love child “The Terminator,” Cameron seemed to work in reverse starting his series off as a tale about a robotic monster from the future, and then transformed his premise in to a darker science fiction parable about the imminent apocalypse and the sheer labyrinth that is time travel.
Deadly Friend (1986)
One of the many movies I first saw when I was a kid that didn’t really cater to the Disney movie standards enforced on me by my parents, that incidentally enough helped nurture my love for movies, was Wes Craven’s 1986 horror romance “Deadly Friend.” For those completely unaware, “Deadly Friend” one of the least notable Wes Craven horror pictures even if it’s his most creative after “Nightmare on Elm Street.” Merging a science fiction killer robot concept with a revenge plot, director Craven tells the story of a young genius who moves to a new town to work on a project at the local college. You see this young man has a thorough understanding of the brain, and is destined for great things. Which is made apparent by his robotic sidekick BB.