The Wachowskis aspire for something unusual and awfully contradictory with “Speed Racer.” They want an intentionally animated live action film, but a film that also looks as realistic as possible. They want a family film, but this is a film that may not be appealing to all children, and they want a story that simple but also quite complicated. Just when you think you’ve seen all of Spritle and his monkey, there’s an unusual tale about corporate corruption. Maybe it’s because of all the contradictions and hapless surrealism that I responded to “Speed Racer” with such enthusiasm. I know it won’t be for everyone, and it definitely has its own flaws present, but speaking as someone willing to meet the Wachowskis halfway, everything involving Speed and Racer X made for some interesting drama.
Tag Archives: sports
Debbie Does Dallas (1978)
Let me tell you, its tough reviewing one of the most famous porn movies ever made. Hell, its tough reviewing porn, period. How do you review a porno movie? I can’t really speak on the acting, because hell, it’s a porn movie, there aren’t Oscar winning performances. And the production quality is abysmal. So, how do I go about this, I ask myself. But you’re probably asking why I’m reviewing a porno movie. Well, it’s just because this over-opinionated asshole wanted to throw his three cents in on this classic film. You’ve all heard about it. You know about it, so I thought I’d just give you the lowdown. The reason “Debbie Does Dallas” is such a bonafide classic is simply because it has everything men and women like in a porno. The sex scenes are staged fantasies, the cast is comprised of cheerleaders, and our main character is hot. “Debbie Does Dallas” has a huge history in the film medium. For proof on that, check out “Debbie Does Dallas Uncovered,” and you’ll see what I mean. The reason why “Debbie Does Dallas” was big was because of Bambi Woods. People attribute the success of this film to many things, but I pin it on Bambi Woods. Woods isn’t (or wasn’t, if she’s actually dead) a fox in the strictest sense.
American Pastime (2007)
I’m always grateful of films that manage to use its cast of actors for their talents and not the pigeonholes they’ve had put upon them. “American Pastime” is one of the few movies I’ve seen in years that uses its Asian American cast to provide some strong performances, and not fight mystic martial arts of some kind. There’s always talk of African Americans being used poorly in America, but the most suppressed race in the film medium are the Asian Americans. “American Pastime” brings out a strong turn out from its cast of seasoned veterans exploring the plight of the Asian Americans during Pearl Harbor, and many established families being forced to live in Internment camps.
29 Reasons to Run (2006)
I’m sick of road trip flicks, I’m sick of coming of age flicks, and with all due respect to our indie audience, I’m sick of movies about relationships with narration. “29 Reasons to Run,” however, completely made me re-think that thought process. I shouldn’t write off the road trip flick just yet. That would be unfair. Weeks’ and O’ Steen’s ambitious film raises the argument for the road trip flick and restores hope that there’s still a lot more to be done with the sub-genre. In some moments it can resemble an ABC drama, but I don’t hold that against it. “29 Reasons to Run” is about two men facing a dead end in their life, and decide they have to travel the road, which may be great for a novel “Sideways”?
Bad News Bears (2005)
Well, I guess every director has to have one film that’s commercial to grant them enough dough to get them through the rough times. Even one of my favorite directors of all time, Richard Linklater. It’s not that Linklater can’t do a commercial film, because “School of Rock” was great, but this is a remake. And Linklater is better than this. He’s ten times better. And he can make all the excuses he wants, but I’m still shocked the same man who created “Waking Life” was behind the camera of this remake. As usual, Linklater doesn’t do what others do. In other words, he never makes a film as everyone assumes he is. Sure, this is a remake, but this is a kick in the balls remake, just like the original was a kick in the balls kid’s film. There’s profanity, crude humor, sexual innuendos, and Billy Bob Joe Bob Thorton channels “Bad Santa” for his variation of Buttermaker. And I was pleased.
Who's Ma Ma! Joe Ma Ma! (2007)
Sean J.S. Jourdan seems to have a knack for perfectly pinning humanity in all its chinks and warts, and that’s a true talent. Not many directors can properly capture the human tragedy and when it comes along, it has to be appreciated. “Who’s Ma Ma!” is a short documentary about a simple family of men who have endured horrible tragedies in their lives and yet—they still stagger on.
Stan Lee Presents: The Condor (2007)
What Stan Lee has basically done here is create his very own Spider-Man. With the Condor, we have a basically privileged young man whose life is really in need of a boost. When his parents die, he is rendered basically crippled after being attacked, and becomes a superhero. One that talks the villains to death to piss them off. The Condor is basically the equivalent of the Spider-Man rogue Rocket Racer with a mixture of that lame superhero from the nineties: MANTIS.