For the five people that loved Tim Burton’s “Alice in Wonderland,” Disney decides to give us yet another take on Lewis Carroll’s tale, as Alice ventures in to Wonderland to travel through time. And literally tries out run it as she experiences the oncoming specter of adulthood and hard decisions rearing its ugly head at her. Stepping in for Burton this time is James Bobin, who manages to assemble virtually the entire cast from the first film to tell what is essentially a very convoluted and incredibly tedious movie. Truthfully, director Bobin’s film isn’t as bad as Burton’s first film, but Bobin spends so much time trying to Burtonize his sequel, he forgets to inject any kind of entertainment in to the nearly two hour drama adventure.
Author Archives: Felix Vasquez
Bunnicula, The Vampire Rabbit (1982)
I admit I never read the “Bunnicula” movies when I was a kid nor did I ever really see the animated specials. The TV movie was one of those specials ABC played after Saturday morning cartoons as a means of promoting different types of kids literature. “Bunnicula” is one of the more creative of its type and a definitely fun Halloween treat for kids that love horror that isn’t too scary. Set in a small town, two boys find a weird scripture with the words “Bunnicula” written on it, along with a slumbering rabbit inside of a box.
Meridian (1990)
Let’s face it: “Meridian” is only a Full Moon classic because it has the insanely sexy Sherilyn Fenn being all nude and scantily clad and whatnot. Co-star Charlie Spradling even has her change to unclothe as we’re given full view of her breasts during a surreal scene involving a party with a bunch of supernatural gypsies. “Meridian” watches like a really sluggish two dollar romance novel from a super market, where the author tried really hard to appeal to the horror audience, but failed big time. “Meridian” has a ton of beast on woman sex scenes, all of which are slow motion, to boot. One scene in particular bears a shocking similarity to the one in “Bram Stoker’s Dracula” where Dracula rapes Mina’s sister Lucy.
In a Valley of Violence (2016)
In a year where Hollywood is trying very hard to resurrect the star studded Western once more, Ti West comes along and casts Ethan Hawke in one of the most simplistic love letters to the sub-genre ever filmed. “In a Valley of Violence” doesn’t so much have a narrative as it has a string of events that coincide with one another, leading in to a chain of revenge, violence, and death. Ethan Hawke’s character isn’t a hero, and John Travolta’s character isn’t entirely villainous, they’re both pushed in to unfortunate corners. It then becomes a bunch of scoundrels striking one another down thanks to the actions of one individual who sets up a huge string of events that slam in to one another in bloody chaos. Ethan Hawke stars as enigmatic Paul, a lone drifter who has only his side arms, his horse, and his loyal dog Abbey by his side.
The Rocky Horror Picture Show: Let’s Do the Time Warp Again (2016)
TV is dying and the only way a lot of the networks are being able to stay relevant is by hosting a ton of live remakes of classic movies and musicals. Many of them even live. After the huge successes of productions like live “Grease” and “The Sound of Music,” FOX boldly takes on a remake of “The Rocky Horror Picture Show.” The latter of which is a production that’s above and beyond a cultural landmark more than a movie musical. Unlike most remakes, I didn’t have a problem with “Rocky Horror” being remade for television this year. Fans have been offering up their own interpretations since the original film became a midnight movie classic, and the movie has managed to transcend the cinematic medium and become something of a statement. I think of this remake from FOX as more of a cover song of a great original tune, and it’s hard to not enjoy this as a sweet companion piece.
Billy Club (2013)
Drew Rosas and Nick Sommer’s slasher movie is a mixture of “Slaughter High” and “Scream,” where the pressure of sports amounts to a triple murder one summer that scarred a group of friends forever. Said friends were all members of a team once, and now a killer dressed as an umpire is roaming the streets murdering various individuals. The pair of directors is able to keep the killer Billy an intriguing villain as the individual roams the darkness and spends a great amount of time craftily trapping his victims. His weapon is the icing on the cake as it’s a bat covered in rusty nails, and a small slot where a large knife can slide out. This allows for some interesting kills and follows through with the baseball gimmick.
31 (2016)
It’s amazing how a man like Rob Zombie who fancies himself a hardcore horror fan has done little to evolve since his first film “House of 1,000 Corpses.” Every film he’s made since that initial movie has repeated the same beats over and over, just re-arranged in various ways to look new and original. He fills the screen with genre veterans again. He inexplicably sets his movie in a mid-seventies gritty trailer park landscape. The opening of his film is directed by a goofy music video, padding the run time, and he even includes something of a montage with our characters, set to classic rock music as we saw in the finale of “The Devil’s Rejects.” Worst of all, he writes some of the clunkiest dialogue I’ve ever heard, and he is still dead set on placing wife Sheri Moon Zombie front and center.