Phantom of the Grindhouse (2014)

phantomgrindhouse3One interesting however minute exception you have to give “Phantom of the Grindhouse” is that it at least has its heart in the right place. And even when it rides off the rails in to complete nonsense, you can sense the cast are committed to delivering comedy to compensate for the apparent lack of budget. Its entire macguffin revolves around the group of characters throwing a big grindhouse festival to save an ailing movie theater, but we never actually get to see the festival being held. There aren’t even shots of the characters spreading the word of the impending movie marathon.

From the director of “Terror at Blood Fart Lake” and “I Spit Chew on Your Grave,” comes “Phantom of the Grindhouse” a relatively short, but valiant attempt to deliver a horror comedy. Rather than pad the run time with tedium, director Chris Seaver packs the first ten minutes of the movie with VHS style faux grindhouse trailers of varying quality. Truth be told, they’re the best part of the feature, and they seem to be inspired by the trailers from the Tarantino-Rodriguez feature with their version of “Don’t!” entitled “Nothing!”

From what I gathered, a local grindhouse is about to close, so to keep it open movie fan Christine (the lovely Desiree Saetia) concocts the double bill idea and a movie marathon in hopes of saving their beloved movie community. Just then an inexplicable phantom of the grindhouse (a la Phantom of the Opera) that seems to love Michael Jackson and Prince arises and begins murdering the characters and local staff one by one. There’s a lot of padding and meandering from the narrative with director Chris Seaver not even remotely trying to elicit a scare from his audience.

You can also sense most of the cast are doing nothing but improvising their lines, or at least riding off the rails from the script to go hog wild with comedy and wacky double takes. Like much of the contemporary takes on grindhouse, the film is soaked in eighties nods. So there’s a Weird Al spoof, a character that oddly enough does nothing but mimic Michael J Fox from “Back to the Future,” and the heavy implication that this movie is set in the eighties. Though, due to the clear lack of budget for the film itself, it’s hard to really figure out if that’s the intent. That said, while “Phantom of the Grindhouse” is fifty minutes of mostly nonsense, I didn’t hate it. I appreciated what it was going for, and I wish director Seaver had a bigger budget to deliver something even better than what we get here.

The Prowler (1981)

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You can really see Tom Savini’s fingerprints all over “The Prowler,” as it elicits a lot of gruesome deaths for such a downbeat slasher movie. Much of the effects also echo a lot of the gore we saw in “Dawn of the Dead” including the exploding head moments. That said, “The Prowler” is a surprisingly strong slasher effort that doesn’t hold a lot of doors open for sequels, but manages to be a surprisingly decent and vicious whodunit with a creative and merciless serial killer unleashed on a vacation resort.

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Massacre Mafia Style (1974) [Blu-Ray/DVD Combo]

One thing you can say about “Massacre Mafia Style,” Duke Mitchell’s shameless attempt to cash in on “The Godfather,” is that it’s never boring. Even when it’s brutally silly it really is also a compelling bit of exploitation that tries desperately to out Godfather “The Godfather.” It does so to the point where the film’s anti-hero bawls about the end of the Italian crime organization and hints at “The Godfather” as a goofy portrayal of the Italian crime legacy in tears. It’s a valiant attempt to set itself apart, but it surely won’t be confused for the aforementioned crime drama any time soon.

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Cabin Fever 3: Patient Zero (2014)

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Like the former films in the series, “Cabin Fever 3” doesn’t really offer audiences anything but a ton of gore, and vain attempts at gross out humor. Pile on a helping of misogyny, and you have the recipe for yet another piece of trash in the Eli Roth bred gore series. You can sense the producers really stretching this time around for shocks and splatter that can stun viewers, all the while spending a lot of empty filler on characters we really don’t bother to care about, since they’re there just to rot in a gory bloody pool, anyway. Director Andrews presents a better flair for directing than previous director Eli Roth, so that’s a plus, however minor.

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All Cheerleaders Die (2013)

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Directors Lucky McKee and Chris Siverston backtrack over their 2001 indie horror film “All Cheerleaders Die” and remakes it in to a classic rape revenge horror film where hormonal jocks get their comeuppance. Director McKee and Siverston seem to have a lot of fun with the premise, channeling the likes of “Jawbreaker,” and “Satan’s Cheerleaders” in what is one of the more creative revenge horror films I’ve seen in a while. Maddy is an aspiring journalist who begins following around her friend Alexis during her tryouts for the cheerleading team. As well she learns about Alexis’ views on politics in high school not to mention the twisted social dynamic involved with dating and being a cheerleader.

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Go Go Mania (1965)

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It all started with the Beatles. From there it was a slew of really interesting British Invasion groups, and singers, many of whom ranged from absolutely abysmal, to quite unique. It’s a shame many of these bands never quite garnered the legacy that the Beatles did, but “Go Go Mania!” has value, if anything, in showing how many bands climbed out of the woodwork to claim their own fame once the Beatles stormed America.

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The Baytown Outlaws (2012)

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You know your cast has done a great job with their respective roles when they’ve successfully turned three dumb, ignorant, gun loving red necks in to charming heroes you root for until the bitter end. Surely enough, director Barry Battles’ grindhouse redneck chic romp isn’t an easy sell as, after the first ten minutes, I was ready to toss this aside and look for something better on my plate. But surely enough after spending time with it, “The Baytown Outlaws” eventually won me over, completely. In fact, I kind of fucking loved it, all things considered.

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