Rowan Blanchard and Paris Berelc are two of the most interesting Disney personalities to come around in a while. So it’s pretty disappointing when they’re teamed up to star in a DCOM that’s pretty limp from the get go. Aside from barely being about Halloween at all, the entire notion of the movie never plays out effectively. The movie struggles really hard to find stuff for characters to do, and when it’s failing at that, it somewhat concoct subtle religious commentary. When it’s not doing that, it creates a series of plot holes that just leave the movie feeling incomplete and incredibly far fetched even for a kids movie.
Tag Archives: Romance
Alleluia (2015)
Gloria, a single mom with a simple life, meets Michel and they go out for dinner during which he begins a con on her. After a one-night stand, she lends him money to help keep his business afloat. Little does she know, he spends it at a bar as she goes looking for him. She finds him and convinces him to keep her around. Together, they con women out of their money by seducing them as a brother and sister duo. Gloria’s jealous soon rears its ugly head and turns to violence and murder. The two then continue their romance and their evolution towards total chaos.
Martyrs (2008)
I think if it weren’t so obsessed with its own self-indulgent pseudo-spiritualism and didn’t stop to tell four different stories simultaneously, “Martyrs” may have been a decent film. It begins as a solid revenge picture, but then devolves in to an absurd campaign in torture and pain. It’s a grueling sadistically boring horror drama with a narrative so convoluted I stopped caring about what was unfolding after the first half hour. “Martyrs” loves to pretend it’s this transcendent statement about our questioning of the afterlife, but in reality it’s just misogynist torture porn painted as art house dribble that will make you feel dirty.
Magic Mike XXL (2015) [Blu-Ray/DVD/Digital]
After the pop culture explosion that Steven Soderbergh brought to screens with 2012’s “Magic Mike,” director Gregory Jacobs does a bang up job of carrying the torch. “Magic Mike XXL” is a mixed bag that sags in the middle but is overall a very entertaining road film. After three years retired from the erotic dance business, Mike receives word that former boss “Dallas” is dead. Shocked to learn that he is very alive and abandoned his former group of dancers, Mike is inspired to rejoin his old team after a serendipitous airing of the song “Pony” reminds him of his old days.
Sabrina the Teenage Witch (1996)
Melissa Joan Hart is really good casting as Sabrina, the young witch who discovers that she has magical powers on her sixteenth birthday. Hart was always able to convey the girl next door charm and otherworldly beauty well, and she is able to transform Sabrina in to an admirable silver screen heroine. Much like the comics that spawned her, Joan Hart plays Sabrina a transfer student from Massachusetts who goes to live with her aunts at Riverdale. She’s fairly new to her school and dreams of becoming one of the senior elite. On the day of her sixteenth birthday, she discovers that she comes from a long line of witches and that her aunts are her witch mentors.
R.L. Stine’s Monsterville: Cabinet of Souls (2015)
I don’t know how they keep recruiting these Disney stars to headline the RL Stine movies. Disney always seems to have such a tight grasp on them. In either case, “Cabinet of Souls” is the very definition of an RL Stine story, except with a much longer format. It surely sports the same mold and aesthetic with a small town, teen protagonists, and evil villains that seek to ruin their innocence somehow. It stumbles on occasion, and there’s a clear lack of wit that you can usually find with Stine’s yarns, but it’s a pleasing movie; especially if you’re a fan of Dove Cameron, Katherine McNamara, or Ryan McCartan.
Random (2015)
Cindy Maples really has a clever film on her hands here that I hope storms festivals soon enough. I didn’t know what I was expecting with “Random, but surely enough I was happy with what resulted in the end. Maples is a very talented director with a skill for exposition and characterization, while also telling a story that’s quite gripping.






