BAD MOVIE MONDAY: Star Wars Episode IX: The Rise of Skywalker

I’ve never liked reviewing a film right when it comes out. You get caught up in the hype whether you like it or not, swallowed into the propellers of either the always positive marketing machine or the always negative social media rage engine, both of which are revving at full speed. So your review suffers because you can’t stay impartial in that sort of environment. It’s like trying to judge the power of a hurricane while standing in the eye of the storm. I saw this movie a few years ago. I won’t say that I “watched” it because that wouldn’t be accurate.

I played it on a streaming service and then sort of half glanced at the screen. Now, in the interest of science, I’m going to watch it again because I feel it’s a good example of what I like to call “advertiser friendly corporate content.” This is the sort of movie that has an insultingly low opinion of its audience. It’s cynical, insincere, soulless, lazy, and ultimately empty. It’s to cinema what school cafeteria food is to cuisine.
Continue reading

Door Mouse (2023)

I’m pretty surprised that Avan Jogia had it in him to direct one of the better indie films I’ve seen all year. Shockingly, “Door Mouse” is not based on any particular comic book or graphic novel, but its influences are taken from obvious places like Frank Miller, Sam Spade, Scott Pilgrim, Tank Girl and the like. Jogia is mostly known for being a former Nickelodeon actor in America who then transitioned well in to adult films, but he’s also proven with “Door Mouse” to be a pretty awesome director when all is said and done. “Door Mouse” is a pulpy, neo-noirish, crime thriller with some great references to comic books and a very clever use of animation as a means of helping to add to the overall pulp fiction aesthetic that Jogia seems to be aiming for.

Continue reading

Tales from the Apocalypse (2023)

I’m shocked at how great “Tales from the Apocalypse” was, and I say that as someone that loves a good apocalyptic yarn here and there. While I wouldn’t be quick to compare it to “Trick r Treat” as the premise has explained, it manages to stand on its own two feet as  great anthology filled with five great science fiction shorts obvious influenced by the likes of Ray Bradbury, Rod Serling, and Richard Matheson. I’m also glad a lot of the shorts picked for this film aren’t the usual tired tropes, but aim for something so much more meaningful and thought provoking.

Continue reading

Asteroid City (2023)

I confess that I’m just not a Wes Anderson fan. I’ve tried very hard to be over the years, but so many of his movies have left me cold, indifferent, and just downright bored. With “Asteroid City” it feels like Wes Anderson is appealing to his hardcore fans more than trying to create something that’s accessible to new fans. With his sense of framing and shooting scenes that feel like bad A.I. jpegs, and his multi-layered, somewhat confusing narrative, “Asteroid City” will score with folks that loved the likes of “The Grand Budapest Hotel” or “The Aquatic Life.” As for me, I entered it hopeful and left generally indifferent by the whole affair. Not even the obscenely talented ensemble cast could win me over, I’m disappointed to admit.

Continue reading

Bad Girl Boogey (2023)

I give filmmaker Alice Maio Mackay a lot of credit for pressing forward with a slasher movie that’s based a lot around the LGBTQ community and a slasher that’s centered on murdering citizens of that community. There aren’t many horror movies that focus on the whole LGBTQ experience and on a slasher that’s centered on them and only them. While I do credit director and writer Alice Maio Mackay for trying to offer something different, “Bad Girl Boogey” excels in the directorial department but sorely needed work in the script department. The script is an aspect of “Bad Girl Boogey” that could have stood at least a few more rewrites and re-thinking.

Continue reading

The Flash (2023)

Like it or lump it, after delays, and delays, and restarts, and bad press, and alterations, and production problems “The Flash” is finally here. And–I lumped it. It’s not to say that “The Flash” is the worst movie from the DCEU yet, but it’s definitely not one of the best. It’s a shame as the trailers inspired so much optimism and enthusiasm, but at the end of the day, it’s a terribly mixed bag with occasional redeeming qualities. Beyond the fan service, and Easter eggs scattered throughout, “The Flash” is right at the level of “Shazam: Fury of the Gods”; whether or not that’s a positive perspective is up to you.

Continue reading

BAD MOVIE MONDAY: Verotika (2019)

I’ve written at length about what makes a good bad movie, but what makes a BAD bad movie? This is what I’d like to talk about in today’s review because I think I found the perfect example. Here is a movie that is so bad, so incompetent, so mind-numbingly lazy, that I can’t just overlook its flaws and give it the benefit of the doubt like I normally would. This is a movie that is insultingly and aggressively terrible. Yes folks, I’m talking about VEROTIKA.
Continue reading